What's the difference a ham and bugs bunny? -When I see a ham on the dinner table, I eat it. When I see bugs bunny on the dinner table and asks me "what's up, doc?" I stay away from sugar for a while and get tested for heroin

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Knock knock. Whose There? Megan Megan Who? Your Wife...

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A moose walks into a store, walking up to an employee he says "Where are the potatoes?" The employee replies "Isle 5." The moose thanks the employee and heads off to find Isle 5. Upon reaching isle 5- he finds no potatoes.

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Hot Lady: What do you do for a living? Guy: Phosphorus, Oxygen, and Radon. Hot Lady: So you are a chemist? Guy: Think again! Think about Acronyms... Hot Lady: OPRa, so Opera correct? Guy: (Obviously talking to a Blonde) P, O, Rn Hot Lady: So, you are a chemistry teacher! Guy: (Sighs to himself thinking how PORn relates to chemistry. Which it does in biochemistry, but he does not know that).

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Hellen keller

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Why did the sloth cross the road? To slaughter your entire family.

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Yo momma's so old, she lives in a nursing home and is on various medications that she needs to take to stay in optimum health.

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How many dead babies can you fit in a child's swimming pool? 9 (Trust me, you won't be able to squeeze the tenth one in there.)

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A whole 'nother.

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Why doesn't Andy wanna bend over to puck something up? That's how he got assraped!

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Why do ducks have flat feet? To stomp out forest fires Why do elephants have flat feet? To stomp out flaming ducks

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How do you find out a chinese's name? Ask him/her

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what kind of pizzas did the twin tower executives order on 9-11? two large "planes"

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what is 2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2-2+2x0 20

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Why do black people have white hands? Palms and soles are not in direct sunlight, and therefore less amounts of melanin are produced in those regions.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Sunflowers are yellow Wanna have sex?

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You know what's funny about AIDS? Nothing.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Cause fuck you thats why

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Roses are red, Violets are rare because of the irreversible damage to our ecosystem in recent years.

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What's black and white and red all over? A dead penguin

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I met this girl and we really got along, then one night she tied me up, I thought she was getting kinky...then she ripped my face off....

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How much hard work does it take to become a man? To get to the other side!

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Knock Knock Who's there? Charles Grodin. Charles Grodin who? Exactly.

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I saw a TV show last night. And it was good.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops