So I said to the man "That's no banana, thats my wife!"

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What did the man say after jumping into a well? He didn't say anything because he died instantly after jumping head first into a dry, 20 foot well. His family mourned for three days.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a tomato.

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A horse walks into a bar, the bartender asks "Why the long face?". The horse being a horse and doesnt understand english is confused and scared by its surroundings it gallops away knocking over a few tables.

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I knew a little girl once. She was ate before she was seven.

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i once bought a timeshare, guess what happened? i'm broke

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A horse walks into a bar, and the bartender immediately shoots it in the face with a double barrel shotgun, ending the rabid animal's life

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Why did the Mexican mow the lawn? The grass was getting to high and needed to be trimmed.

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What was Helen Keller's favourite colour? None, due her disability she was unable to see colours...

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I like my coffee like I like my slaves... Free

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What time is it? It depends in your location and time zone

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Q: Why does it snow in Canada and not in Mexico? A: Because Canada is far from the equator and Mexico isn't.

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Why was the black man unemployed and in debt? Because current socio-economic realities and systematic racial discrimination place him at a disadvantage in terms of education and employment. Indeed, it is statistically probable that he was raised below the poverty-line, greatly limiting his access to goods and services and his future options from birth.

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when choosing a bedtime story.... jack the rippers life stories is not a good idea... ........................................................................

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Knock knock Who's there? Owl Owl who? Owl Johnson, your neighbor. Oh hi Owl, please come in.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks, "Why the long face?" The horse, incapable of understanding the human languages, promptly shits on the floor and leaves...

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what do blondes and rocks have in common? they are both material and have extension.

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What's worse than being raped by a giant scorpion? Eating mud

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when tempuratures get to high the elderly will start to DIE :( ;O

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Jake pulled out a gun and held it to his head, planning to fool his friends because he knew the gun was empty. Then his friend thought he was helping out his suicidal friend by stabbing him.

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Roses are reds violets are blue when your parents says your beautiful they're lying to you

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A redhead walks into a bar. The bartender asks him if he wants a drink. He says yes.

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Bill had two options the red truck or the blue sedan. Your mother is a whore.

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What's sad about 4 black people in a cadillac going over a cliff? It was my cadillac

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops