why did the chicken cross the road? He saw his family getting murdered and tried to stop it but got hit in the process

What's dark, has an opening, and guys like to go in it. A cave

There are 3 types of people, those that can count and those who can not.

Everytime God shuts a door, he opens a window... ...But I am the Goddamn locksmith!

I was expecting something like that... Anyway, good you do not mind in particular, because that means I am just boring myself here, so, tell me something about yourself you don't tell people most.

Remember when Jesse Ziegenbein was skinny? yeah niether do I

What's the difference between Josef fritsal and a fridge? A fridge can be thrown at a bowl of custard.

Q: If a tree falls in a forest and no one is there to hear it, does it still make a sound? A: Yes

XD Okay then, just a little and I am not very fond of it, I mean I tried something called tekken but that just made me nauseus. Then I got into some car racing game years ago, RidgeRacer I think, but when I moved the car to the sides, I kinda involuntarily tilted to the sides, and ended up smacking on the ground a couple of times.

Yo mama's so fat that she needs substantially larger clothes than most other people

Whats black and white and red all over?? Half a zebra

A pair of brothers walked into a bar. It was where the wake was being held from their mother's funeral.

A horse walked into a bar. The bartender asked: "Why the long face?" The horse said: "My wife just died."

what do you call 100 muslims on a plane? Passengers

What happens when your dog is bad? A crying dog who has to sleep in the BACKYARD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Stupid dog....

What can never be seen by the owner, looks like Jesses mom, and smeels like shit. Jesses dick.

How many women does it take to changed a light bulb? 12. 11 to form a committee and 1 to make her boyfriend do it.

what would abraham lincoln do if he were alive today? scream and try to open his coffin.

what do you call a blind man who buys a caller i.d.? handicapped

A white man applies for a job two weeks later he finds out he lost the job to a hardworking Mexican who went to college and payed his debts

whats the difference between a black and a bunk bed? a bunk bed can support 2 kids.

How do you pick up girls in Auschwitz? With a dustpan

What did the blind, deaf and dumb kid get for Christmas? The sweet, merciful release of death at the hands of his father, who had been struggling with the emotional and financial drain of raising a severely disabled child for many years. It was only a matter of time before the man snapped, as he was a single parent working twenty hour days, seven days a week, to just barely cover all the medical bills that the specialists and therapy incurred.

Did you hear about the Dislexic Devil worshipers? They sold their soul to Santa.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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