A chicken walks into asda/walmart The person at the counter says: "What can I get you?" The chicken says: "Cluck"

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Knock Knock? Who's there? Sanderson. Sanderson who? You're boyfriend. Let me in. No, I'm a bit busy chopping up dead bodies. Come back in a bit. Oh let me help you! I like the way the blood runs out of the fresh ones!

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Your dads so fat he needs to go on a diet

thumb_up thumb_down -23

A man is playing pacman, on his last life, and is cornered. He inserts another coin in the slot.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

A black man checks his watch. He sees that its 3:50, and calmly carries on with his day.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Did you hear about the man who lost his right arm and left leg... He's ok now he's all right.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

BAr intO a wAlks… sorry I wrote that joke after walking out of a bar.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Want to know a joke? There is no joke.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was a registered sex offender who recently got out of federal prison after a 20 year sentence.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

A dyslexic walks into a bar. He called it a bra because he was dyslexic and dyslexics misspell things. People laughed at him because mental disabilities are inherently humorous to them.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Who's a pedophile and not afraid to show it? The clown from McDonald

thumb_up thumb_down -23

If the goverment wants us to be eco friendly then why are the eco friendly cars so expensive?

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Coldpaly is a good band

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Why did the eskimo drag the seal into the igloo? Because the whale wouldn't fit.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

How do you make a clown stop laughing? Hit him in the face with an ax.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

The black man at the narcotics anonymous meeting said, "oh, this isn't bingo is it?" then walked out of the room feeling mildly embarassed.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

What do u call a woman geometry teacher. Santains wife.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

When the mom got home from work, she was very tired. Her 6 year old son asked her nicely to make him a PB&J sandwich. She said sure and made one. Her son was very pleased and ate all of it. He knew he had a great mom. I actually lied above. The mom was killed by three men in hoodies in her back yard. They came inside and also murdered to boy. Worst of all the killers stole all of her food including the rasberries the boy was looking forward to eat. I guess it doesn't matter now since he is unable to eat anymore...

thumb_up thumb_down -23

You know what he said? How did you know what he said?

thumb_up thumb_down -23

What is BIG, STIFF, AND FULL OF SEMEN!!!? A SUBMARINE!!!!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -23

What did the boy with no arms or legs get for christmas? X box Kinect

thumb_up thumb_down -23

How many Alzheimer's patients does it take to change a light bulb? To get to the other side.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Knock Knock Who's there? Charles Grodin. Charles Grodin who? Exactly.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Why can't Helen Keller drive a train? Because she's blind.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops