A family has been forced out of their house by ghosts. Who are they gonna call?... Their insurance company.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

What do you get when you cross an own and a bungee cord? My ass

thumb_up thumb_down -18

what did the banana say to the orange? nothing because a banana is a fruit

thumb_up thumb_down -18

why did the girl fall off the slide? she was pushed, by her dad...

thumb_up thumb_down -18

A knock knock B who's there A nobody

thumb_up thumb_down -18

If life throws you lemons, throw them back and ask for some water because lemonade only makes you thirstier due to the large amounts of sugar used.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

How do you make the queen of england cry? You rape her violently.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Cancer. Super Cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

What do you call a man who beats his adopted, black children? A terrible person.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Why did the girl go to the hospital? Her brother dared her to jump off the second story roof of their house...

thumb_up thumb_down -18

What do Grant and Lee have in common? They're both black males

thumb_up thumb_down -18

A man walks into a clothing store, he calls his wife, buys a shirt, and leaves.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Knock, Knock.. Whose there? Its the Census Man!!

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Uhh, yeah, some of it, I mean people never looked me in the eyes on the buss really, I dunno,if you think I am pretty maybe it is just your opinion or something, but thanks, you are hones and its nice. Never been out drinking, I am you know, kinda nerdy, I just prefer hanging out with friends at home.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

You walk by a boy and see he is playing with poop. You ask the boy what are you doing? He says I'm building a office. You ask him why he says "because I don't have shit to make a building"

thumb_up thumb_down -18

theres a straight guy, a gay guy ,and a jew the weird part is the straight guy hits on the jew and the gay guy which make the situation all akward.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Three construction workers, an Italian guy, a Mexican guy, and a American guy are sitting on top of a building eating lunch. The Italian is tired of eating meatballs, the Mexican is eating a burrito, and the American is eating a cheeseburger. They are all fed up with eating the same lunch every day. The next day they all jump off the building for unrelated reasons. It is a tragedy and their families mourn the loss.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

I can still remember the last words my brother said before he kicked the bucket. "Hey you guys,how far do you think I can kick this bucket?"

thumb_up thumb_down -18

"Why can't you hear pterodactyl when it goes to the bathroom?" "Because the pee is silent?" "No, because they are dead, you idiot."

thumb_up thumb_down -18

What's worse than being hit with a falling brick? Being hit with many falling bricks. -ilikecrepes97

thumb_up thumb_down -18

What's 1 + 1? Fish. What's 2+2? Window. pie.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Me: Wanna play a game of red light and as I get closer to you, you get to call red light?? girl: Yea! okay, go! girl: green light!! Me: Sorry, firetrucks don't stop for red lights

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Why did the chicken cross the road? To suck my dick

thumb_up thumb_down -18

What is the worst place to be in race if you're racing with me Behind me

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops