Why did the kid throw a clock out the window? The kid was probably having a temper tantrum and it was an expression of frustration.

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Whats better than throwing a baby off a building? Catching it with a pitchfork.

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Why wouldnt you want to hit a black man that is on a bike with your car? It mite be your bike

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Why was the Jew gassed to death? Because he forgot to turn the gas off.

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What did the pretty young girl get for her birthday? Cake and presents (get your mind out of the gutter).

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A dog walks into a club. Just kidding I hit the dog with a club multiple times, killed it, and went to jail for the murder of an innocent animal.

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A elderly man was driving down the freeway when he got a call from his wife. He answered the phone and his wife said "Be careful dear, I just heard on the news that someone is driving the wrong way on the freeway." The wife then heard a loud crash over the phone as the drunk driver going the wrong way slammed head first into her husbands car, killing them both intstantly.

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The word you are looking for is charm, not seduction, I am above such things, and while I have no reason whatsoever to believe either one of us can gain anything from going "eye for an eye", I am sure I can offer whatever financial and even specialized assistance you might require in order to get that eye of yours seeing clearer than before... Worry not, I shall outlaw the name Nero and all the derivations and similarities from my Order, unless someone named Nero actually happens to come by of course...

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What would you call the baby of an elephant and a rhinoceros? Nothing. They are two entirely different species and therefore cannot breed.

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Why did Colussi miss school for 2 years? -Because he died

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Why was the orphan's christmas sad? He got a violent chest infection and died.

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What do you call a Muslim flying a plane? A pilot

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Have you seen Whitney Houston's new house? Neither has she.

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Q. What do black people, Asians, and Irishmen call their moms? A. "Mom"

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thomas the train walked up to an old man and said nothing. mostly because trains cant walk, and they cant talk.

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A horse walks into a bar, prompting the show-jumping judges to subtract points for failing to clear the obstacle.

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You're so sweet I have diabetes

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Yo mamma is so old that she lives in a retirement home for the aged, and will most likely die there in several years.

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Why is six afraid of seven? SE7EN!

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What do you call a person who is deaf. It doesn't matter, they wont be able to hear it when you call them.

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whats worse than having ants in your pants? getting sotomized by a lightsaber

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A man walks in to a bar, Has a drink, and leaves.

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How does Helen Keller play the piano? With one hand.. She needs the other hand to sing.

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hey i just met you and this is crazy i have alzheimers hey i just met you

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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