- Anti Joke

What's brown and sticky? A stick.

Why did suzy not eat her breakfast? because i stapled her to the table.

Why did the Albino cross the road? He was going to the skin pigment store.

How many blondes does it take to change a light bulb? All of them.

Why wasn't my friend laughing at my jokes? Because his grandpa is dying.

What did the boy with no legs get for Christmas? A nice sweater.

Two muffins are sitting in a oven, The other muffin says to the other muffin nothing, Because muffins are unable of human conversation.

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Bill: Knock, Knock. Sean: Who's there? Bill: It's your neighbor, Bill Walters, from across the street. Sean: Oh, hey Bill, how are you and Margie? Bill: Oh, I'm doing fine, but Margie just got out of the hospital for a broken arm. Sean: My gosh, what happened. Bill: She was just loading the Halloween decorations down from the attic while I wasn't home and fell. She's fine though; it was only a minor fracture. Sean: Well thank goodness she alright. Bill: Anyway, I came over to return those hedge clippers I borrowed from you last month. Sean: Oh, thank you. How did they work? Bill: Just great once I gave them a coat of oil. It was a big job... I haven't trimmed those bushes in three years. Sean: Yeah, these clippers have belonged to my grandfather, father, and me. Bill: Darn, thats quite amazing, I wish I could get a pair of those, but I doubt they still make them. Sean: I'm pretty confident they don't, but you can borrow these anytime. Bill: Thanks Sean thats very generous of you. Sean: No problem, I almost never use them myself. Well I better get back to Jeanie...I'm helping her make dinner. Bill: Alright, Well thanks again.

two mexicans are in a car, who's driving one of the mexicans!!!

Why couldn't Sammy ride a Bicycle? -Because Sammy is a Fish

Why did the sloth cross the road To fuck your gay cousin

Parents were talking about a particular whore house and tries to keep it secret to their son. Father: Bob and I saw the house near the river, its a whore house full of prostitutes. Mother: Shhh! Our son is listening. The Son enters the room. Son: Don't mind me, I know that area. Both parents were angry: So you've been there!? Don't deny, you know! Son: Just because I know doesn't mean I've been there. I know the moon has less gravity but I haven't been there.

What do you call a school bus full of black people? A school bus

why has kallum just changed clothes to speak to a counsellor because he's socially awkward and has no peers

Why did the girl fall out of the swing? Because she had no arms.

When life gives you cancer, make cancer-aids.

What's brown and sticky? A stick.

If the human population held hands around around the equator A significant portion of them would drown.

What is small, slimy, and thrown in the garbage? A stillborn

Why shouldn't you download music? Various reasons.

Want to hear a clean joke? Soap.

What happend when they were 3 guys in the air? They were skydiving

roses are red yoda is green my lightsaber needs 2 hands if you know what i mean

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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