how do u have sex with a really hot girl who is not interested in you? Rape her in a dark ally

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A man walks into a bar. He hits his head, and then goes to the nearest drinking establishment.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'm going to murder you Did you look behind you?

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I AM SHOWERING IN THE BLOOD AND ORGANS OF ENDORPHIN RUSH IN ORDER TO APPEASE THE GODS KNOWN AS... ME, MYSELF, AND I!

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Wanna know my life in a nutshell? Well you can't. Life is an inanimate object an will therefore not fit inside anything, let alone a nutshell.

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Q: How many chicken nuggets can fit into an olympic size swimming pool? A: 8,563,690,152... Corndogs

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roses are red violets are blue porn hub is down your mums facebook will do

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Why did the blonde leave the lamp on while sleeping? Because it helps to see in case you need to get up in the middle of the night. YOU THOUGHT I WAS GOING TO SAY "BECAUSE THEY'RE A LIGHT SLEEPER!" MUAHAHAHAHAHA

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Knock knock! Who's there? Hitler, time to shower!

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If you die laughting, How are you telling this to me?

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W. If I was one thing other then a person why would I be? M. The sun. W. Aww, so I brighten your day? M. No, you're just hard to look at.

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Why couldn't Dumbo fly? Because he had just been killed by an African Poacher, and dead elephants can't fly. This is very sad.

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Knock Knock........wait there cars gone, I'll come back later

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SQUID DOMINATION!!! Squids WILL Take Over the World!!!

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what did the little boy say to his mom? nothing his mother died in childbirth.

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Roses are red Violets are blue You're a whore

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What's brown and sticky? My ass.

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An Englishman, and Irishman and a Scotsman are on a plane. The plan is carrying too much weight, and is destined to crash. They drop the luggage, but there is still too much weight on board. They drop the secondary engine, but there is still too much weight. All three men then jump out. The plane crashes anyway.

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How do you offend a black man? Call him a nigger.

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Whats worse than 20 dead babies in a garbage can? A: The smell

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What do you tell your chicken when it is it's birthday. Nothing, because he wouldn't understand you.

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How do you get a black man out of a tree? Tell him he won the current game of hide n seek.

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Listen Erron, what`s wrong? I would have told you to go fuck yourself if it where not for the fact that AzureDragon just left for the cafeteria and is nowhere to be seen.

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What is the key to a good anti-joke? A disappointing or intellectual punch-line said in a calm and passive tone.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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