How did Hitler fit 100 Jews in his car? Ashes don't take up much space.

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What do you get when you cross a Dachshund and a Nazi? Bestiality. Ew.

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what did Harold Camping say to the little girl and boy? "You and your parents are going to die today"

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Still Carrying Heavy Pet Food? That sucks

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What did the boy who was in a chainsaw accident yell to his mom when he was on a rollercoaster? Look ma, no hands!

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okay so theres this guy.

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Why did David Hasselhoff talk to his car? Because it was KIT from knight Rider and had voice recognition software and so could understand him

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What do you call a person in a morgue? Dead.

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An astronaut walks into a bar. He orders a beer. After waiting for about 1 and a half minutes he receives his beer. The bartender says it was 3 dollars. The astronaut checks his wallet and finds no money so he pays with credit card. The bartender swipes his credit card but the card doesn't work. So the astronaut takes out his debit card. When the bartender swipes the debit card it worked. In relief the astronaut looks at the bartender and says "Thank you" and then goes home.

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Q. what tall and looks like a jew? A.TODD

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Wha do you call a couple with aids? 2 pepole who need immediate health treatment.

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What did the Farmer say when he lost his tractor? "Where's my tractor?"

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How do you kill a retard? Give him a knife and say "who's special?"

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How many apples do you end up with if your dog is a golden retriever who got raped by a giant scorpion? A jail

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Finn: Jake, why can your body do all of those magical things? Jake: What do you mean? Finn: Oh never mind. And they both proceeded to enjoy a delicious breakfast.

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Why did the jew go into the gas chamber? Because he thought he was going to get a shower.

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What's blue and smells? A dead girl guide.

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there are seven of us," reply the babies, "now get us a round of bloody marys

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How do you know a black person is in your house? You see him in your house.

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What did the psychiatrist say to the man wearing nothing but Saran Wrap? - "That's for food. You should wear clothes instead."

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What do you call sad communities that have to share resources? Communists.

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Q: What's the difference between a grasshopper and pencil? A: Lots

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Why was 6 scared of 7? Because 7 has been convicted on multiple accounts of murder and Grievous Bodily Harm

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What do you call a big group of Chinese people on Mars? An extraordinary feat for the Chinese space program and a historic day in human history, where a particular country has set up the first human colony on another planet and we have proven to ourselves that our race is capable of interplanetary travel and can accomplish anything if we set our minds to it.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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