What happened to the chicken that crossed the road? It got ran over by a car!

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What do old people break when they fight? A sweat

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What do you call a dog with 2 legs? Doesn't matter, it's not going to come anyways.

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A duck walks into a bar, the bartender says, "What'll it be?" The duck says "Got any grapes?"

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What did the moose say to the photographer? Moose say cheese.

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What did the pet lion say to its owner? Nothing. Lions do not have the ability to speak. The lion then proceeded to hunt down its owner, pin him down and rip out his insides. Besides, the likelyhood of owning a lion as a pet is very slim, and even if one did, this act would be highly illegal in most parts of the world.

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Why did the gay man's ass hurt? He has rectal cancer.

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your so fat. your fat!

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what's gray, rectangular, and provides a good time? your mother's sex tape.

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guess what im a bitch i have no balls and i can slap your mum in the face

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So, two black guys walk into a bar... And they pay their tab and couldn't have been more courteous

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find the o 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duh its up top

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I'm Ryan Dunn, and this is a 120mph car crash

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Why did Kim Kardashian's and Kris Humphries marriage last so long? It didn't

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What do you call black people working in a field? Farmers.

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Doctor, doctor, I think I've got a problem! Correct, you have got acute cancer, you have 2 months to live.

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hey i just met you,but this is crazy, my name is kony and i just took your baby

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Ludwig van Beethoven, John Coltrane, John Lennon, and Justin Bieber are out for lunch at a taco stand. The owner calls the police, and Justin Bieber is arrested for digging up corpses.

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what has four legs but cant walk? a dog after anal

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 commited statutory rape on a younger 5, gang banged 8 with 10 and 11, murdered 9, and was sentenced to jail for life.... eventually the case was dropped and 7 was let out early for community service. He told 6 he was coming for him 6 months later.... 6 was so terrified he didn't know what to do... he was living in fear... eventually he commited suicide by jumping off a cliff just off the coast of Palm Beach into the pacific ocean. His body was never found His family didnt get to say good bye... This is why 6 was afraid of 7

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The frightened girl did everything the man said. " Open your legs. Bend over..." She was playing Simon says and was afraid to loose. It wasn't sexual abuse, which her sister had experienced while traveling around the world in 2007.

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A black guy stands outside the Tigers stadium with a cigar and tries to sell tickets... noone buys them... I have a comlplete raging boner and I'm gonna go beat off!

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Why did Martha Stewart's skin hurt? My friend has a skin condition :( and is dying, skin cancer is not something to make fun of.

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What happened to the Jewish man while he was in the shower? He accidentally fell asleep and was late to his job.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops