Man: Would you like to see someone Man 2: Sure Man: How bout the inside of an ambulance

A Jew, a Christian, and a Muslim walk into a bar. A good time was had by all, until closing time.

What did the little black boy get for Christmas? Hopefully something nice.

Roses are blue Colton is gay

Two cows are standing on the top of North Pole and in a half-inch wind they're spanking a bottle of coconut jam. Suddenly two infrared gallopping fly past them. What's the consequence? That people shouldn't use freshly peeled lemoncakes on underwater cornfields.

Who doesn't love finding money in your pocket when you go to put your pants on? a rape victim

I have read and agreed to the terms of service

Why did the man launch his rocket into the sun? He didn't. Overcoming the sun's orbital pull would require your rocket to travel ~7,400,000 mph, which is a velocity that is impossible for today's rockets to reach.

Which ballet do pigs like best? Pigs don't understand ballet, but they probably like the ones with audience participation, as they are friendly animals and enjoy interacting with humans.

Did you hear the one about the pizza and the salamander? Neither did I.

What do you a call a black man in a two piece suit? A respectable citizen, racial profiling is ignorant.

Yeah your point? Anyway, so then the brain surgeon goes: I have have cut into thousands of brains, and never seen a single thought.

Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock? Whos there? Not Sally...

what did the hammer do on the test -he nailed it.

A pope meets another one

what do u call a joke with no punchline? A joke with no punchline

A: How do you piss off a female pilot? Q: Kill her family

A man walks into a bar.. and has a bomb strapped to his chest

Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

roses are red orchids are black I like you best when you lye on your back

Whats round and bouncy? A bouncy ball

Were you born on a freeway? because thats were all accidents happen.

What did the black man do when he saw a bike sitting on the sidewalk? He took it into the shop paid for it and rode off feeling good about how hes helping the environment.

What's red and weighs a metric ton? An apple, my scale wasn't calibrated

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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