What's worse then me banging your mom? The fact that I gave her HIV

Justin Beiber walks into a bar. The bartender does not serve him because he is not the legal drinking age yet.

How many babies does it take to paint a house? Depends how you throw 'em.

why did the asian kid do well on his math test because he studied

What's blue, wriggles around, and sits in a corner? A dying baby in a plastic bag. What's green, doesn't wriggle around, and sits in a corner? A Christmas tree. The current homeowners were never made aware of the atrocity committed by the previous occupants.

The once was a little girl named Suzy who liked swings; the only trouble was that she had no arms. In order to avoid having any jokes written (and recycled thousands of times) about this fact, she decided to run a sponsored marathon in order to pay for prosthetic arms. Suzy swung happily for the rest of her days. [L]

A man buys a kitten from the store. He gets home, takes it out of its cage, and realizes that it wasn't the kitten he wanted. He then returns to the store and exchanges for the kitten he originally wanted, but then decides to keep both because he is feeling particularly hungry.

Knock Knock. Who's there? The police, your entire family died in a car accident. ... ... The police, your entire family died in a car accident who?

What did the chocolate milk say? Yoo-hoo.

What's worse than being fired? Eating a bucket of diarrhea.

Nero, seriously, one way or the other, ill kill you, my mom blushes like every time people talk to her so fuck you, my sister if you touch her, ill.... Man, stop and ill forgive you, and I am very very sorry, now stop sending me those pics, and please do not post them anywhere, Line would not want to.

A blond is on her way driving to the airport when she sees the sign "Airport left." She made a left turn and got to her flight on time.

What is white and flys at you from a tree? A refridgarator. I lied about the flying part.

What's the only think duct tape can't fix? Your parents divorce.

What did the kid with no arms or legs get for Christmas? I'm not sure, he could not unwrap them.

Nigel Farrage and the concept of UKIP.

Why did the black man eat lucky charms? Because it was breakfast time and he was hungry.

What do you do to a woman who has a black eye? Punch her in the other eye so that they match.

What's the difference between Santa and a Jew? Santa goes DOWN the chimney.

2 guys shot up a morgue..... 13 bodies remain dead.

Rebecca Black. That's it. That's the joke.

Why didn't the woman have a penis? Because she was female.

69

what did the tree say to the person? nothing trees cant talk

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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