So a guy walks into the doctors and say "Doctor it hurts when i poke my knee like this" the doctor says "Let me see your hand" the doctor squeezes the patients finger and the patient says "ow!" the doctor says "now poke you knee again" the patient pokes his knee and says "it still hurts" so the doctor comes to a conclusion and says " you dont have a broken kneecap you have a broken finger, stupid, now get out and leave me alone!"

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Why did the chicken cross the road, roll in the mud, and cross back again? Because he was a dirty double crosser

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Why did the room go dark? Somebody turned the lights off

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What is terrible and doesn't exist? This joke's punchline,

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What's the difference between a gluten free cereal and a regular cereal? One has gluten, and one has no gluten.

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Why did the little boy fall off the swing? Because he has no arms.

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Why did the little girl cry in school? Because she remembered her parents were both in prison. She is in a state run foster academy.

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Your mother is so poor she doesn't have any money!

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What did steve do when jane asked him for a pencil? He gave her one.

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A black man has a woman up against a wall, and she is screaming. they are passionate lovers and he is pleasing her greatly.

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How do you stop the skunk from smelling, you rip it in half and bury the body therefore stopping the smells from escaping.

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Steve, what do I write on a 3946 if more than two vehicles were involved?

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What is better than getting a job? Getting a better job.

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Why wouldn't they give Helen Keller a driver's liscense? Because she was a woman.

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a man walked into a bar.the bar was metal and he cracked his skull

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why do asprins work? Because they're white

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You know what makes me sick? Bacteria

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who has less of a soul then you? a ginger

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why did the boy drop his ice cream? a terrorist dropped a bomb on him which turned into a transformer, raped him and then burried him inside of his refridgerator

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Why doesn't Susie have a bike? She has no arms. Who pushed Johnny off a cliff? Definitely not Susie.

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what happened to the little kid on a bicycle? Nothing

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What is the sun's favorite day of the week? The sun is a mass of incadescent gas and cannot feel emotions; therefore, it cannot have a favorite day of the week.

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A boy writes an anti-joke. It is not funny. He sees his friends teasing him about the jokes stupidity. He promptly pokes his eyes out with a dull broom stick. He can still hear his friends mocking him. He cuts his ears off with an industrial meat slicer. He wakes up the next morning and doesnt give a crap about the prior days events. Mainly because he can no longer see or hear.

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Q. what is your favorite food? A. Chicken, burritos, sandwich, rice, hot dog, turkey, duck, carrot, broccoli, eggplant, apple, blueberry, pear, raspberry, blackberry, orange, grapes fries, chips, cheese, pretzels, worms, and candy canes.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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