Why was the mother sad? Because she had just watched her beloved baby get shoved in a blender.

What is the difference between a person of Mexican heritage and a park bench? One is a bench, the other is a human being.

Mam: Wanna hear a joke about my penis?... nevermind, it's to long. Woman: wanna hear a joke about my vagina?... nevermind, u wouldn't get it.

What is funny to watch but stinks of shit. Jews oh and SBB they both stink and are funny to watch.

Yo mama so stupid, she signed an apointment with Dr. Pepper

"You just went and made a new dinosaur?" "And due to its well-developed core muscles the staff behind Jurassic World has called it - 'ABDOMINUS PEX'." "That's a stupid name."

what does 2+2equals? i think its 3 but i could be wrong

What do you call a kid with down syndrome and no arms? Whatever his name is.

What is hard, long, moist, and flesh colored? A hotdog you dirty, dirty bastard!

How do you find a true idiot jump in the road when the light is green.

So i can type anything in this box and it shows up on the website?

Why did the man ask his wife to make him a sandwich? He lost both of his arms in the war.

What do you call a bear in the rain? A wet bear.

So a woman walks out of a kitchen, she is instantly mauled by a bear.

When will pigs fly? When they grow horns

When life throws you lemons, Throw grenades.

You just sunk my battleship! 5,000 people just perished at the bottom the ocean in a war for pointless political reasons.

Q: Whats 5+5 A:10

Two muffins are sitting in an oven. The first one turns to the second, and says nothing, because muffins can't talk. They then both die because the temperature in the oven was 370 degrees.

How do you kill an elephant? -With a gun? No, an elephant gun. How do you kill a red elephant? -With an elephant gun? No, with a red elephant gun. How do you kill a blue elephant? -WIth a blue elephant gun? No, you choke it until it turns blue and kill it with a red elephant gun. How do you kill a purple elephant? Theres no such thing as a purple elephant, thus contradicting the reality of performing a major act of animal abuse on it.

why did the black man cross the road? to get away from the racists

I used to be an adventurer like you, but then I was raped by a giant scorpion...

my rhyme is sicker than the holocaust

So a woman goes to the doctor for an ultra-sound. The doctor says I have good news. The woman inquisitively replies what is it doctor, the doctor replies ; Your baby is Dead.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...