How do you make an emo kid cry? He already is.

What's the difference between liberals and communists? Nothing.

What's the difference between a hundred dead babies and a porsche? A porsche is a car.

Why was the little boy sad? He had a frog stapled to his forehead

First joke of the most-disliked area; 9/11 joke. First joke of the most popular area; Holocaust joke. "You shouldn't joke about 9/11 you sick bastard people died" -Said all Americans ever.

what do you do when you see a black man limping across your frontyard? you stop laughing an reload.

What's the quickest way to a person's heart? A knife

Why did the chicken cross the road? Um...thats impossible because chickens live on farms theyre are no roads....

What's Michael J Fox's favorite toy? While, a magic 8-ball might first appear to be a good guess. Let's be honest, those things really lose their luster after the first couple times. More likely it's something like a sports car or big screen television.

What do you call a man with no arms or legs on the doorstep? The Diabetes man

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he died. Why did the elephant fall out of the tree? Because he was to fat. Why did the snake fall out of the tree? I don't know everything, Bitch!

What do you call a dog with two tails? ...Depends what its name is.

What do airplanes and trees not have in common?? Bananas

Why did the boy fall off the swing? Because he got shot in the face. Why couldn't the boy get back on the swing? He had no arms. Why didnt his mum come and save him? She is blind, deaf and in a wheelchair.

Have you heard about the hipster paleontologist? He liked dinosaurs better when they were underground.

A Muslim walks into a bar. No-one survived the blast.

Roses are red Violets are blue I can't rhyme The end

Q: Who lives in a pineapple under the sea. A: Tsunami victims.

Where did Sarah go during the bombing? Everywhere.

What's better than winning a million dollars? Winning 2 million dollars!

Why did the old lady talk to a tree? She had Alzheimer's and was going to die.

What do you get when u cross a owl and a bungy cord...........my ass

A Priest and a Rabbi walk into a bar together. They discuss the fundamentals and aspects of Religion.

What shall we do with the drunken sailor? Call the police to have him escorted off the boat for operating a large veichle under the influence of alcohol.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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