How did the chef bake 20 muffins for the king? My name is Bob.

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What do Native Indians and Asian Indians have in common? They're both human.

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Q: What did the dog say the cat? A: nothing, because dogs cannot speak, and even if they could, I highly doubt they would speak cat.

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"Lassie, Lassie, come quick! Timmy is in the well!" "I'm a dog," replies Lassie. "You folks have ropes, ladders, and opposable thumbs. What the hell could I possibly do to help?" With that final act of disobedience, Lassie was turned into fertilizer.

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A Polish man walks into a bar and says, "Co za asy..."

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Neither have I

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A blond was walking alone down a street one night. Then she was suddenly mugged and raped. She reported her attacker but he was never caught.

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Why Is Six Afraid of Seven? because he is black.

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Why did the baby cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken.

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roses are red violets are blue sugar is sweet and grass is green due to the fact that there is chlorophyll in it.

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Whats Better Than an Anti Joke? sex...

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Why did the black homeowner default on his house? He was paying significantly more in mortgage than the actual market value of the home, since he purchased his property before the housing bubble. He carried out a cost/benefit analysis and derived the conclusion that he was effectively destroying his own wealth by paying his mortgage bills.

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How do you piss off a gypsy? Curse at him

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what's worse than finding a worm in your apple? finding two worms in your apple

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SUCK MY NUTS

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why did kermit cry?Ms.Piggy knocked him out on Christmas and he slept through the party and all of the presents

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Knock Knock Whos there Cameron oh

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Why do new moms put "BABY ON BOARD" stickers on the backs of their cars? No reason. Hitting someone's car baby inside or not is against the law and very dangerous for passengers of any age.

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what's grosser then 1000 babies stapled to a tree?? 1 baby stapled to 1000 trees

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A kangaroo walks into a bar and says "Lipstick is the blood of all wounds." The bartender does not know how the kangaroo said this or why.

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why did so many people die in the typhoon in the Philippines because they had to finish there math homework

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Jack and Jill went up the hill. It was in the middle of winter and they froze to death.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Against city ordinates, an old woman was keeping chickens in her suburban back yard. One escaped, and there was no where else to go.

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What's John Lennon doing these days? Decomposing.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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