Your mums a potato

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What should you do if reading the antijokes on this site makes you collapse with laughter? There is no need to worry about this because it won't happen.

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Roses are red, violets are blue my neighbor is black he will jump you too

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How do you get four gay men on one stool? You get three more stools.

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Brain fart

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"Knock knock!" "Who's there?" "A door to door salesman. Are you unsatisfied with the way your dish soap handles your plates? Then I have the product for you!" "I'm not interested in your product, but thank you anyway." "No problem. On an off note, how did you hear me? I didn't speak very loudly when I said knock knock, and I didn't even bother to knock on the door or ring the doorbell." "I have really good hearing." "Oh, okay. And for future reference, maybe you should open the door when talking to a visitor. Then body language gets established and the conversation flows more nicely that way." "That's some good advice, and I'll take it. Thanks, salesman." "You're welcome. On to the next house."

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What do you call a deer with no eyes? A shocking example of the cruelty suffered by animals at hands of humanity.

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What do you call a mexican who steals toasters? A mexican toaster thief.

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Your boat breaks down on the highway. How many squirrels does it take to eat a bannana? Squirrels do not eat bannanas but it would probably take a monkey 1.5 milliseconds.

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alert("Hello");

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What is both blue and yellow at the same time? Green.

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Why did the sloth cross the road? To slaughter your entire family.

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What do you call a horse that likes to box? A horse

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God wrote this joke.................................

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Why do blondes where knickers? to keep their ankles warm

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Why did the chicken cross the road?? Blue.

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Whats old and has been alone for years. Your dead nan

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You read this in school as the kid sitting next to you stares at his computer screen.

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what do you call an octopus with 9 tentacles? a male octopus

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ms caissie is secretly laughing at these...

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A german police officer sees a Rabbi. Nothing happens, it's 2011

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What's green fury has 4 legs, and if it fell out of a tree it would kill you. A pool-table

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What's the difference between a duck?

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Why did the little girl fall off the swing? a fridge was thrown at her

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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