how do you save a black person that's drowning? you blow up their lips

How many pollacks does it take to screw in a lightbuld? Likely the same number as is required when people of non-polish descent screw in lightbulds. Overall however it is variable based on the number or bulbs, position of bulbs in relation to ceiling, potential shakiness of required ladder, and desired efficiency. Please reference GE's lightbuld home instillation handbook for further information or alternately contact your local electrician or handy neighbor.

What would George Washington say if he were alive? "Help! im stuck in a coffin!"

roses are red violets are blue i suck at rhymming you have nice boobs

What did a Blond do in the Desert? She got lost after Falling of a flying carpet

I drove my Chevy to the levy. It was dry.

who's a slut... you're mom

How do you make a baby cry? You throw bricks at its face.

where do you find a dog with no legs? Korea. It's customary for the guests to get the drumsticks.

Q. Why did Obama cross the road? A. To collect taxes from the houses on the other side

why was the teenage girl crying? She was molested as a child

Q: what do you call a camel with a garbage bag on its head? A: A ziploc baggie

What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Evicted.

An old man, and his daughter are walking down the street. They are having a nice time, until the daughter turns around to see the old man lying on the ground in pain because of the crippling arthritis in his back that has caused him agony and discomfort for years.

A friend of mine said; the only vegetables that makes you cry are oignons. that was before I hit him with a watermelon

A black man walked into a bar. He cashed in big on workers comp.

How do you blindfold a Chinese man? With a blindfold.

Two fish walked into a bar. They died. Because fish can't breathe out of water.

What is Hitler's favourite Yu-Gi-Oh card? Blue Eyes, White Dragon.

What is Ron afraid of? Spiders!

Q: What's the difference between Yo' Mama and a blue whale? A: About 10 pounds.

What's worse than a worm in your apple? Two worms in your apple.

What did the man dying of cancer want for his birthday? To live.

Why was the boy crying? Because him and his sister were sent to an orphanage.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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