If I could rearrange the alphabet, I would put C where A is. :D

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a young boy with no arms or legs log rolls himself outside where he gets struck by lightning

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Whats the difference between a falcon and a deer? both live in water, except for the falcon... oh, and the deer.

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What happened while Thomas crossed the street? He got hit by a truck. What happened to Billy? He was Thomas's Siamese twin, and he too met the same fate.

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What do you do if a blonde throws a grenade at you? You die.

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Roses are red, and many other colors too.

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knock knock whos there? jew jew who ? jew son o a b**** ? (aimed at ight wing racist jews)

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so a blonde walks into a bank, opens her purse, pulls out her check and cashes it. She then returns to her car and proceeds home.

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What do you call a lesbian dinosaur? Nothing, it's still a dinosaur! Her sexual orientation is regardless. ~kyle hudson

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A terminte walks into a pub and ask is the bar tender here?

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Q: What's purple and eats desks. A: My dog.

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Why did the young teenager cut class? To cut himself! Get it?! Its a pun!

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Whats brown and sticky? Shit.

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Holocaust jokes are not funny. And I don't see the humor behind them.

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What do you call a man with no arm or legs lying in front of a door? Idk, but how did he get there, and where is his aid to help him get out of this situation?

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There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge said, "Herp derp dur" to which Fridge's mother replied "Shut up, Fridge."

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Why did the woman shout at the bin? Because she is mentally ill

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Poop

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Knock knock. Who's there? The interrupting doctor. The inter-- --You have cancer.

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What did the little boy get for Christmas? Presents.

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A burglar broke into a house one night. He picked up a CD player to place in his sack and a strange, disembodied voice echoed from the dark, saying, "Jesus is watching you." He nearly jumped out of his skin, clicked his flashlight off, and froze. When he heard nothing more, he shook his head, clicked the light on, and began searching for more valuables. Just as he pulled the stereo out so he could disconnect the wires, he heard, "Jesus is watching you." Freaked out, he shined his light around frantically, looking for the source of the voice. Finally, in the corner of the room, his flashlight beam came to rest on a parrot. "Did you say that?" he hissed at the parrot "Yep," the parrot confessed, then squawked, "I'm just trying to warn you." The burglar relaxed. "Warn me, huh? Who in the world are you?" "Moses," replied the bird. "Moses?" the burglar laughed. "What kind of people would name a bird Moses?" "Devout Semites," the parrot replied.

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How many Jews can you fit in a car? It really depends on the make and model of the car, as well as the relative size and weight of the people in question, but legally you can only have as many people in the car as there are seatbelts available for them.

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how how does a black man jump. the same way anyone else does

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A child walk's into a bar. And gets sexually abused.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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