Why didn't Michael Jackson celebrate his birthday? He's dead.

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What did the farmer say after the chicken started talking? Holy shit a talking chicken.

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What's green and fuzzy and if it fell out of a tree it could kill you? A pool table

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What is small, red, and can't fit through a doorway? A baby with a spear through its head. Posted By: Lram

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How do you make a French-man cry? Kill his family.

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Why was the man so cold? He was in a fridge

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Why did the black cop pull the white guy over? He was going approximately 52 miles per hour on a 40 miles per hour speed limited road.

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what did the guy think who woke up with his hands and feet nailed to a barn. IS THIS BECAUSE IM BLACK!

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your friend is gay, but you are not. nothing happens

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wanna hear a clean joke? bob took a bath with bubbles. wanna hear a dirty joke? bubbles was a man :) i heard this somewhere and it made me laugh :)

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Why cant Sally ride her bike? Because she has ceribal pausly

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Q) What do you get when you cross a brown chicken with a brown cow? A) An abomination

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What is the proper response when someone says "My family died in a car crash"? Lol fail

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Why does everyone treat Jesus as some sort of saint for making five thousand people bread, when Hitler made six million people toast?

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Who are the faster readers? New Yorkers, they through 110 stories in 5 seconds

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"Mommy! Look, I found a turtle!" "that's no turtle." "Oh..."

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How many dead babies can you fit in a tire? It depends on the size of the tire.

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Why was the woman in the kitchen? She came in to give her husband, who was washing the dishes, a kiss before she went to bed early so she could be well rested and get up on time to make the 45 minute commute to the hospital where she worked as a neurosurgeon the next morning.

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What's funny about Antijokes.com? Everything

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Guy 1: Why does it smell like a wet dog? Guy 2: Because I smell like a wet dog

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Roses are red, Violates are blue. I have an erection, and its lasted more then three hours

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Roses are red violets are blue this poem makes no sense refrigerator.

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Q: What do you call an underground train full of professors? A: It's very unlikely that the passengers on an underground train would consist entirely of professors, unless it was a special service booked solely for the attendees of highly specialised lectures which required each audience member to have completed a professorship.

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Adam Thomas is homosexual

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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