Why did the witch ride her broom? Because the vaccum was to heavy...

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knock knock who's there boo Jenny had a heart attack due to the scare, she was taken to hospital and died

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Why does Michael J Fox have such good handwriting? Through years of hardwork, perseverance, and rehabilitation.

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Jesus can walk on water, but Chuck Norris can swim on land... it's called having a swimming pool

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Yo mama's so fat that when she steeped on the scale, it read a rather large number as compared to the average, healthy weight of the human race. Of course, she could become thin by working out or eating less, but she chooses not to because of the laziness that has now corrupted her completely.

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What do you call a woman who has huge breasts? Sarah, for instance.

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What is red and invisible? No tomatoes.

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Q: What's worse than a paper cut? A: 9/11

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A man sits down to dinner with his wife And she notifies him that their 8 year old son just died

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Why did the chicken cross the road?? Because he felt like it okay!!! Just let him be!!!

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Roses are red Violets are blue Your window is open I'm watching you

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why was the woman out of the kitchen, because she had to have sex with her husband in a bed

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Roses are red, Violets are purple not f**cking blue!

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What do you call a taxi driver eating on a gourmet restaurant? A taxi driver.

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Why did Larry drop his suitcase? Because he had no arms. A) Knock knock, B) Who's there? A) Not Larry

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Why did the the dog not eat its food? Because the night before the dog had gotten serious disease and lost appetite

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Why did little Suzie spill her drink? Since birth, she has lacked a jaw.

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Q: How do you confuse a blonde. A: Put her in a circular room and tell her to pee in the corner. Q: How does a blonde confuse you? A: She says she's done.

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What's worse then having gum stuck on the bottom of your shoe? Having a stick poked in your eye. What's worse then having a stick poked in your eye? Having a nail go through your foot. What's worse then having a nail go through your foot? Having a stick poked in your eye and a nail going through your foot.

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what do you call a blonde skeleton in the closet? last years hide and go seek champion

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What do you call a black male teacher? A: A Teacher .

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Why do females have boobs? So they can breast feed their babies.

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Why was Rodney afraid of Chung Lee? Because Chung Lee is an intimidating person, capable of literally ripping your face off.

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What is a waste of time and money? Your mother.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops