What happened to the Chicken who crossed the road? It made it to the other side!

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What do you call a person without a heart? Not alive.

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why did the monkey fall out of the tree? because it was dead.

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A duck walks into a bar and asks for a beer. The bartender realizing this is an odd situation, seeing that ducks cannot articulate the English language, realizes he must be dreaming. He wakes up and turns to tell his wife about the dream, but she won't respond. He then realizes how his marriage is in shambles...

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What do you call someone who puts one number on here as a joke? Someone with no life.

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what is orange and sounds like a parrot? an orange parakeet

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What happened to the boy with cancer? He died

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What do you call two Japanese men digging through rubble? Worried family members of missing relatives due to the recent devastating tragedy in the island nation of Japan.

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What happened when the president cut the hedge That is a highly improbable solution because he would probably have a body guard do it.

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What does Michael have in common with NASA? Not a lot.

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You dropped something.... Yo lip

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How do you make a blond cry? Rape her and kill her family.

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What's 13 inches long and 3 inches wide and drives women crazy? My diick

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Knock Knock Who's There Al Qaeda

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How many freudians does it take to unscrew a light bulb? Two. One who unscrew the lightbulb and another who hold the penis....eehhh i mean ladder.

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Tom: Did you here about the blond who went to college? Mike: No. Tom: Well I heard she's leading a very successful life.

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who has moral fiber? a cerial killer

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What did the little black boy get for Christmas? Hopefully something nice.

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Why didn't the man tip his waitress? Because he's a cheap bastard.

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Where did Jenny go after the explosion? Everywhere

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person 1: wanna hear a knock knock joke? Person 2: sure! Person 1: okay you start person 2: knock knock Person 1: who's there?

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What's green and has wheels? A frog in a wheelchair

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Hazel and Gus are two teenagers who share an acerbic wit, a disdain for the conventional, and a love that sweeps them on a journey. Their relationship is all the more miraculous given that Hazel's other constant companion is an oxygen tank, Gus jokes about his prosthetic leg, and they met and fell in love at a cancer support group.

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how do you break up with someone lightly and not hurt their feeling I dont want to hurt your feeling but i hate you

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops