What is red and ragging? A Hemorrhoid

MR MC CANN WHATS THE ANSWER

Q: How many Jews can fit in a car? A: 5 in a standard mid sized sedan, or 7 in an SUV

Why did the man crossing the busy road die? because he wanted to

What do you call someone like Sarah Palin? A tragic victim of America's flawed educational system. But hey! She learned one thing though! Russia is right in her own backyard! Oh wait that would be wrong unless her backyard stretched all the way across Alaska and the Bering Sea. So she didn't learn anything at all. OK she's just dumb

I heard a scary rumor that when you plzy a windows istaller cd backwards, it plays a secret message, but what's even scarier, is that when you play it forwards, it installs windows.

Two polar bears are sitting in a bathtub. The first one says, "Pass the soap." "No soap, radio," replies the second one. "Oh, you want me to turn on the shower radio?" "Yeah, it's too quiet in here. I could use some tunes." The first polar bear turns on the radio. "Now pass me the soap, please," he says. The second bear passes him the soap, he washes his face and neck, and then they both get out and towel off. The second bear switches off the radio before they leave the bathroom.

Do you also think Daffy Duck is really attractive when he dresses up like a woman? Yeah, me neither...

A black man walks into a bar. The bartender, upon seeing him, asks him to leave. The black man is enraged by the blatant racism shown by this man, and proceeds to punch the bartender repeatedly. After 5 minutes of non-stop punching the man stops, looks at his victim, and is filled with remorse. He is dead. Upon looking around, the black man notices scaffolding and building equipment scattered around the room. He falls to the ground as he realizes the bar is still under construction, and unable to serve customers this early in development. The bartender was simply asking the man to leave for his own safety.

Why did the police officer beat the black man? Because the Internet is able to connect a variety of different types of people together and the off-duty police officer was slightly better at the multiplayer game they were playing.

You know what it means when a priest lays his watch down on a podium? Absolutely nothing

Why was girl happy on the day she found out she wasn't pregnant? -It was her birthday.

So a magician was droving down the road and then he turned into a driveway!

What is the difference between green and desert sage? About 20 bucks a gallon.

How do you get through a locked door? Unlock it.

whats worse than a baby impaled on your lawn... the universe being consumed by a giant albino ape with over sized testicles

What did Hellen Keller say when she drove up to the stop sign? Nothing, she doesn't drive.

an average-looking woman walks into a bar. nobody really notices.

If 1+1=2 why does 2+2 not equal 3?

will you like this joke my sources say no

Rose are red Violets are blue all I what to know is what do that mouth do

Did you hear about the kidnapping? Well you should be very concerned because he hasn't been found in 4 years.

your mom gave me head.....phones

What do you call black people working in a field? Farmers.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...