How can you outsmart Stephen Hawking? Steal the wheels of his chair and replace them with a dolphin.

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Why didn't the chicken cross the road? A teenage girl was texting and driving, didn't see it, and now it's roadkill.

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Why not zoidburg? Because Zoidburg is a alien from another planet and the human population is probally afraid to talk to him do to the potential danger of alien contact.

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While getting Sherrie's Crabcakes I was arrested by Missy Hepp highway patrol.

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Roses are red Violets are blue You don't want to be my valintine I'm going to shoot myself.

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So, a Turtle, a Giraffe, and a Hippopotamus walk into Stop-N-Shop. They are quickly excorted out and the Zoo is contacted to take the wild animals. The Manager wonders why they were there in the first place.

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A family has been forced out of their house by ghosts. Who are they gonna call?... Their insurance company.

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Whats gets stiff when you have sex with it? A dead body.

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What do you get on anti-jokes.com? A bunch of repeated "jokes", that don't make any sense.

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What did the 20-year old woman say too the old man? HI GRANDPA!

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kara is funny she loves her money so she buys a bunny for her honey

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A dimetrodon, a pterosaur and a chicken walk into a bar. As they enter, the bartender says "Hold it! We are not licensed to serve dinosaurs." "I am not a dinosaur," said the dimetrodon. "Neither am I," said the pterosaur. "But I am," said the chicken. So the dimetrodon and the pterosaur enjoyed a cold beer each, but the chicken had to wait outside.

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What did the disabled kid do on friday? He fell down a flight of stairs.

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What's the easiest way to become President? Have a background in politics and a catchy campaign slogan that voting Americans can relate to.

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what did timmy from southpark say after his warther melested him? TIMMY

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Whats the difference between a giraffe and an elephant. Ones a giraffe and ones and elephant

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what do you do when mrs curaba gets heated through a fridge at her so she can cool down

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Q: Why was the black guy afraid of the chainsaw A: It was cutting his arm off

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Why was six afraid of seven? Six wasn't. He listens in on women's self defense classes and can deliver a kick to the crotch so hard that it will create for you a new vagina.

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What is worse than a badly told joke? A badly told Anti-joke.

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roses are red violets are blue i have no money could i have some

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what's gray, rectangular, and provides a good time? your mother's sex tape.

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Why did the cow cross the road? Cause he had madcow disease

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Why did the Mexican jump the border? Because his mom told him the grass was always greener on the other side... She lied.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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