Q.If I have four apples and billy has 4 oranges, how many pancakes will fit on the roof. A. 3 because aliens like purple hats.

what do you call 2 walking Arabs with long beards? pedestrians.

What would Jesus do? Something that would in getting nailed to a piece of wood.

why did the chicken cross the road? does a chicken have to explain everything it does?? do u explain to everyone around you why you're crossing the road every time?! i think not!

hey! Wanna hear a bird joke? No. Well this is Hawkward....

Why did Hitler commit suicide? Because he was completely depressed and overwhelmed because of the fact that he had lost World War II.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Who let out the chicken?

What made Chuck Norris cry? Stubbing his toe

What's the differece between a rock and a black guy? A rock can't eat fried chicken.

How do you get a black kid to sleep? A cup of warm milk and maybe a lulluby should do it.

What did the man in the mirror say to the other man The Same F****** Thing!!

Why did the depressed man jump off the bridge? Because bungee jumping is a great activity to relieve stress.

Why didn't bob like night clubs? He was epileptic

Why was the little kid bullied? Because kids are goats.

How many pancakes does it take to make a dog house? Purple because, ice-cream has no bones.

Why is the white man sad? Because he watched the titanic

Say the line below all very fast to get sudden strange sensation... Magic-ish. I like to find threes and peel of their... BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK... ...BARKBARK BARK BARK BARK BARK! Done? Now sit Down, have a little treat Good boy/girl! :Look well at the sun, the jagged Blackness will consume all, Your little star forever but a ever fading memory.

A man walked into a doctors and said, “Doctor help! My arms have stopped working” to which the receptionist replied, “I’m not the doctor and you need to make an appointment.”

What's worse than the holocaust? Dropping your biscuit in your cup of tea.

I met a muslim girl the other day Shes the bomb

School is like a boner. It is long and hard unless your asian.

What did the hammer say to the screwdriver? You're a tool

whats black and hangs from my tree a plum

what's yellow and hovers? a yellow hovercraft.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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