Want to hear a joke You're Adopted

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Two Pigs are in a bath. One pig says to the other "pass me the soap", to which the other pig replies "Do I look like a typewriter?"

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What did the black guy say to the white guy? The black guy said, "hello". They then proceeded to have a normal conversation.

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what did the farmer do? plant

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Why was the boy crying? he was so happy his mom bought him a playstation 3

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Why did the chicken fall down? Because it wanted to have fun

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you were so loud you woke helen keller up!!!!!!!

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What's worse than Patrick in a blender. Uuuuuuuuhhhhhhhhhhhhhh, idk.

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What's funnier than a chicken? nothing.

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What do you call a man with no arms? Disabled... some people can be so cruel.

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Whats the difference between a giraffe and an elephant. Ones a giraffe and ones and elephant

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So a man is in a car smoking weed when he forgets to crack a window so he over doses and dies. The car crashes and he kills 3 other people.

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My grandfather died in a concentration camp. He fell off a guard tower and broke his neck.

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Oh, no! There is a ginger jew within 2 meters of me!

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roses are read violets are blue my fanny is orange I have the flu my name is gemma

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Why was the little boy sad Because he has depression from his father beating him over and over every time he comes home from school...

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Why was the woman in the kitchen? She came in to give her husband, who was washing the dishes, a kiss before she went to bed early so she could be well rested and get up on time to make the 45 minute commute to the hospital where she worked as a neurosurgeon the next morning.

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why was the little girl crying? Because her family was dead

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Y didnt the grandma go to christmas? She died on thanksgiving

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Nah, could not care less about how I sound on "The network", its just that I spent all night finishing the core concept to my new novel, and all the capital letters and stuff sound like Jim Carrey in my head as I type. So Redcunt, where you going? When you coming back?

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Q. Why did Sally fall off the swing? A. Because she had no arms Q. What smells like red paint and is blue? A. Blue Paint Knock Knock? Who's There NOT SALLY

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Q: How do you make a five year cry twice? A: There are many ways, as children are generally not that adept at controlling their emotions. Loud noises, threats of violence, images of scary monsters... those tend to work. Be sure to let them stop crying before making them cry again, otherwise you will have only made them cry once.

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so there was a frog a bear and a walrus... i forgot how the rest goes but they all die because of a nuclear holocaust

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Knock knock. Who's there? Ryan. Ryan who? Ryan Seacrest.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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