Why is Lindsay Lohan out of prison? No, I'm asking.

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What did the dead woman say to the murderer nothing dead people cant talk

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yo momma is so stupid she went and got her self checked for mental retardedness and it turns out she happens to be autistic.

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your mom is so black that it can be assumed she is of african descent

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How many blondes does it take to change a light bulb? Well it depends how many of them can figure out the staircase.

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What did Buzz say to Woody? A lot. There were 3 movies.

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What did the worm a fisherman used to catch fish called when the worm killed a trout? Master Bate.

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Bob is asleep. Knock knock. Whos there? NOT BOB

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Why is the horny toad named that way? Because its a misnomer of the horned lizard.

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Why'd the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was tired of this joke.

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How many licks does it take to get to the center of a Totsie Roll totsie pop? Altough many tests have been done, there still isn't a certain number. There are many variables involved with this question.

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My friend thought that an onion was the only food that could make you cry, so I threw a watermelon at his face.

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How do you get a slave to stop screaming from the rope he is hanging on? You stop messing around and you hang him already!

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the power to turn magnetism into light

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What did the orphan get for his birthday? Shit on.

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What did the computer say to his girlfriend? I'm going to RAM you tonight.

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if got a joke if fogot it

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In the attic lights Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Leaving the things that are real behind Leaving the things that you love from mind All of the things that you learned from fears Nothin' is left for the years Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Lights, voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Leaving the things that are real behind Leaving the things that you love from mind All of the things that you learned from fears Nothin' is left for the years Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic

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69

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Why was Michael Jackson so bad at dancing? Because he had a broken leg.

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Why did 9/11 take place? Because God hates Satan

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How did the fat guy survive the air crash? He was he was astronomically and improbably lucky.

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What's worse than getting shot? Getting shot twice.

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Ask me if I'm a tree? Are you a tree? No.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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