- Anti Joke

What's a worse place to be besides the friendzone? On your grandmas lap crying because your parents just died in a car crash.

there once was a man from Afghanistan. Who wanted to bang his brother-istan. they licked and sucked. and kissed then f**ked, he got aids. and never did that-again!

why was six afraid of seven? because seven eight nine

How many dinosaurs does it take to fill a pool? I don't know and no one will know as they are extinct organisms

Why wasn't the black kid allowed in the school? Because it was the Southern United States in the 1930s and due to racial tensions at the time most public facilities were seperated by race.

whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? getting your Fallopian tubes ripped out by wolverine

What did the white man say to the black man that was very interested in the story he had to tell? Cool Story bro, tell it again!

A blonde, brunette, and a redhead walk into a bar. The redhead, growing tired of the constant ridicule directed at her from the other two, kills them. She pleads guilty to 3rd degree murder on two counts and is sentenced two life sentences in a maximum security prison in Cambodia.

"Almost as accidental as your spelling I'm afraid." -...

A duck walks into a 7-11 and says "Give me some Chap-stick, and put it on my bill!" But the cash register attendee doesn't speak English and cannot understand him. He does, however, question whether his God is punishing him because, as all people know, ducks cannot speak. However, this hallucination must be punishment for a horrid misdeed. The employee breaks down into tears and begins reciting a prayer. The duck, slightly miffed, walks out, pondering why he'd need Chap-stick anyway, since he has no lips.

A apple a day is good for your overall health and you should schedule check ups with your doctor to maintain good health and avoid seeing him everyday.

''Hey, this is absolutely true. There's an organization now called 'Draft Dick Cheney for President, 2012.' Yeah. Good luck with that. They tried to draft Dick Cheney five times during Vietnam. That didn't work.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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What's a worse place to be besides the friendzone? On your grandmas lap crying because your parents just died in a car crash.

Justin Beiber is a good singer

What's fatter than your mum? Your mum's mum

What's the difference between a piano and a goldfish? One's a piano, the other is a goldfish.

whats the difference between ur mom and my mom? nothing i slept with both of them

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Today I'll wear a hat on my head Instead of a shoe.

Who is stupid and no one likes him. Me. :(

Knock knock. Who's there. To get to the other side.

How do you get a clown off a swing? Hold his family at gun point

Why did the black guy cross the road? Because he was late for a meeting

Whats the deal with airline food? I dont know, the cost is included in the plane ticket

The adventures of Helen Keller:

what did the turnip say to the plum? nothing, as most fruits and vegetables would've said