Knock Knock!! . . (There is no response as nobody's home)

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What do you call a boy with one arm one leg and an eye patch? Names

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If all ziggles are zaggles and all zaggles are zumbles, then why is your mother a whore?

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your mom is so nasty that when she took a shower and acquired general etiquette, she became possibly more respectable

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(Timmy has no arms or legs.) A:Knockknock! B:Who's there? ANot Timmy

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what's the difference between Michael Jackson and Acne? Acne is a skin problem caused by chemical imbalance usually found in teenagers. Michael Jackson was a singer and dancer who should've been able to escape tasteless jokes upon his death.

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Anti jokes are stupid Anti jokes are dumb I'm a pedophile, You better run.

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Jose gutierrez is a gay fish.

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What's the difference between jelly and jam? I can't jelly my d i c k in your a s s.

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Why did old Mary fall off the cliff? There were no brakes on her wheelchair

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Micael Jackson enters a bar. Everyone screams, and then someone runs over and pulls the cheap mask off the impersonator's face. Michael Jackson IS DEAD, get over it

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Roses are red violets are blue or at least that's what they tell me because I am blind

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What happened to the black jew? He went to college and died in a plane crash.

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How many rats does it take to screw in a light bulb? Two. But they have to be really small.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Conscience. Conscience who? Oh, sorry about that Hitler, you wouldn't know who I am.

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Why doesn't Hitler drink whiskey? Because it makes him mean.

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Why can't helen keller drive a car? Because she is a woman

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A man calls his 23 year old nephew on a Saturday night. He's calling him, in order to apologise for molesting him when he was younger. As he could no longer live with the guilt and shame. They both start to cry on the phone. The nephew hangs up " I can't do this.." The man receives an email from his boss, saying " Lisa told me she's still waiting for your analysis on the new federal cuts and how they're going to affect us. Please send them asap."

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how many babies does it take o paint a house depends on how hard you throw them

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There was once a family of termites. There was a Papa termite, a Mama termite, and a baby termite, called Motor. One day they reached a big fat log, and they decided they'd bore through. So first went Papa. Bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore...then out came Papa! Next came Mama. Bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore...then out came Mama! Last came Motor. Bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore...then out bored Motor!

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what is green an invisible? this cabbage

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What is green and looks like a blue car? A Green car

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Why doesn't Batman exist? Because he was made up.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was black.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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