Yo mama so fat that she probably has a thyroid problem.

Last Christmas, I gave you my heart, But the very next day, I died.

Why does Rebecca Black like Friday? Because it's the start of the weekend

:)I will always assist you in whatever you ever want. :(I want to kill you!

What do 2 arabs say to each other in a super-market? For those of you who don't know your history, the true Lebanese are Phonecians. As such, they are not Ishmaelites/Arabs. They are from the house of Jaffeth. the youngest of Noah's sons. Arabs are from the house of Shem (i.e., Shemites/Semites), the oldest of Noah's sons, and Hamm, Noah's middle son who fathered Cannah with his mother. Haggar, the woman with whom Abraham fathered Ishmael, was a Cannonite. As such, Ishmael, the father of the Arabs, is half Semetic and half Hammetic. The true Lebanese are neither. Furthermore, the first non-Jewish Christian church was established with the Gentiles (the children of Jaffeth) in Lebanon. And then the shop blew up.

Your momma is such a slut, that she has unprotected sexual intercouse several times throughout any given day, with many different men.

Do gingers have souls ? No, Gingers are a myth made up in the 13th centuary to scare little kids.

A shoemaker walks into a bar holding a shoebox with only one shoe inside. The bartender gives him a drink and asks "Say mister, why are you carrying that shoebox with one shoe?" The shoemaker says "Well sir, it's a long story." The bartender says "Okay, give me the short version." The shoemaker says "Okay, long story short, I'm not really a shoemaker." The bartender asks "Well buddy, what are ya?" The shoemaker gets up from his chair and says "I'm a guy missing shoe."

Two Guys Walk into a bar, you would think one of them would've seen it

Chocolate makes everything better, except obesity.

A Jew, a Muslim, and a Christian walk into a bar... They then sit down and discuss the various political factors driving a wedge between unity, harmony and understanding between their religions. They resolve that despite the differences in religious belief, they truly can coexist, and decide to pursue peace among one another and the rest of society.

Why was the Japanese man unable to see? Because it was extremely sunny outside and he had forgotten to wear sunglasses.

What do you can a Brazilian woman wearing a bikini? It depends on the case, but usually Brazilian women are named "Maria", "Ana", "Júlia" and many others kinds of names, with their root being hispanic, portguese and latin lenguages. Respectively, the names quoted have the English translation being "Mary", for Maria, "Anne", for Ana, and July, for Júlia.

Wanna hear a story bout my uncle turza.... My uncle turza was eating fruit loops one day and there was a squirrel in the trre from 2 days ago he got angry because the spoon was from the phillipines so he punched a whole in the wall and his half uncle cousins sister had a cage.... True story

haiku's are funny. but sometimes they don't make sense. refrigerator.

Why did the chicken cross the road. He didn't, this joke gets old really fast

Only steers and queers come from Texas and i dont see any horns on you so what does that mean? It means I am not a Minotaur.

Why did the woman leave the kitchen? She had finished her breakfast and had to get to her job as a firefighter.

What fires shots? A gun

Your momma is so fat that she could benefit from loosing a couple of pounds.

What did Batman say to Robin before going into the Batmobile? Get in the car.

Terry has ebola

A Jew walks into a wall with a boner. He breaks his nose.

how do you know when an elephant been in your refridgrator The door wont close

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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