What's worse than burning your bacon? Finding your daughter decapitated and raped in the basement.

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Q: What do you call 5,000 dead lawyers at the bottom of the ocean? A: A tragedy worse than 9/11.

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What do you call someone with no body and no nose? Nobody nose.

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Why are black people so good at basketball? Because they practise.

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Its crackers to slip a rozer and dropsey in snide.

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How do you make a snake blink? You can't

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Did you fall from heaven? Because you look like Satan.

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Guest-knock knock (silence) Guest-hello is anyone there? no go away Guest-looks like there is no one here lets leave

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If a plane crashes on the boarder of Canada and The U.S.A- Where would they burry the survivors.

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Whats bigger than a toaster and smaller than an oven? ... ... ... ... ... ... ... .... .... . ... . . . ..... ...... ..... a microwave . ..... . ... ...

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Yo mama's so poor, she doesn't have a lot of money.

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so the weather's nice...

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George Lopez never said anything funny in his life.

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how did the man jump over the mountain? it was a small mountain and he had a trampoline

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What did Little Johny get for Christmas?

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Q: When there's something strange In your neighbourhood, Who you gonna call? A: The Local Authorities!

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A fat man orders a pizza. Then after eating it, he gets a eart attack due to his high cholesterol and lack of exercise

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, most chickens are held on farms, but those that do roam free are afraid of automobiles so therefore they wouldn't go near a road at all. But if the chicken was located in a deserted town there would be no traffic, so then it would be able to cross freely over any road there and not get injured or mortally wounded.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 had a gun...

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What do you call a drunk, blind, deaf monkey driving a car? A bloody good driver!

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What worse than a hurt puppy? Two hurt puppies.

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What did the orphan boy get for Christmas? Cancer. What did he get for his birthday? He didn't make it that far...

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why did the man hit the flight attendant? Im just kidding he didnt.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He believed pedestrians had the right

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops