What Did The Hobo Get For Christmas? A Welcome Home Mat.

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Q: What did they call the dude who was stuck on a deserted island? A: Incontinent.

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Why did the leaf fall off the tree? Because it was Fall.

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Why did the little girl cry in school? Because she remembered her parents were both in prison. She is in a state run foster academy.

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Hey I've got two stories. This one and the next one.

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A young man was lost wandering in a field, when he came upon a small house. He knocked on the door and was greeted by a scary southern man with a shotgun in hands. "I'm lost," said the man. "Can you put me up for the night?" "Certainly," the man said, "but on one condition. If you so much as lay a finger on my daughter, I will shoot you with this shotgun." He couldn't have sex with the daughter because he has severe erectile dysfunction.

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why is andreas making a pizza? since he dosent get laid he likes the feeling of the sauce stinging on his dick

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What's worse than the holocaust? An open-minded black man.

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What's the difference between Michael Jackson and a PS3? Michael was a succesful dancer, singer-songwriter, musician, and philanthropist, whereas a PS3 is a games console.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because his farmer was abusive.

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Albert your flies undone.

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What's blue and smells like red paint Blue paint.

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How do you stop a bus? You don't, and Regina George didn't either.

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What do you call a black pilot? A pilot... are you racist?

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Q: why are black people good at basketball A: god you racist bastard

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Stephen Hawking walks into a bar.

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What's green and frolics in the forest? A flock of cucumbers.

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A man walks into a bar and orders a beer. Then the man pays for the beer and drinks the beer.

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Why don't pineapples grow on pine trees? Because they're tropical.

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Check out our iPhone App!

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arena football

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Your mom is so ignorant that she in completely unaware how the premature termination of QE2 in conjunction with a potential US credit downgrade could substantially impact her fixed income portfolios and hinder her ability to retire in the desired time frame.

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roses are red vilest are blue shes mine and if you take my place my fist will go in your face

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A little boy who was sleeping in his parent's bed woke up in the middle of the night only to discover his mother performing fellatio on his father. "Mommy, mommy," he said . . . except he didn't. He said nothing, and the incident troubled him deeply for many years.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops