How do you make a drug dealer cry? Just say no

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Your mother's so fat.....When she gets on the scale, it tells her how much she weighs

thumb_up thumb_down +16

what did the boy with no arms and no legs get for christmas? A- a tv

thumb_up thumb_down +16

A black man walks up to a white man with a shaved head and boots in a bar He then hands him a ten dollar bill and tells him he dropped it

thumb_up thumb_down +16

What did Woody say to Buzz? A lot. There were three movies.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Why did the moose cross the road? Migration.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Three guys walk into a bar. They each have a few drinks. Then all three leave responsibly in a taxi.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Where did Betsy go after the explosion? Everywhere

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Why did the man have a hard time trying to open the door? The door was locked

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Q: What's brown and sticky? A: A stick.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

A good way to remember which one is Beavis and which one is Butthead is to remember the acronym "Baby Blues." B in baby stands for Beavis, and b in blues stands for Butthead. You're welcome.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

( . Y . )

thumb_up thumb_down +16

I would tell you a joke but I'm not funny

thumb_up thumb_down +16

a kid was born with down syndrome on christmas night

thumb_up thumb_down +16

I wanted to burn alot of calories so i found a fat kid and set him on fire. :3

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Roses are red Violets are blue You're parents are dead All your friends are too

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Q. What did the pedophile get when he went to jail? A. Exactly what he wanted.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

what do you get when you combine an astronaut, a microwave and a bathtub? A suicide investigation

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Why did the boy get diagnosed with Cancer? I don't remember I have Alzheimers.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Why are Asians such bad drivers? They're not: it is a racist stereotype that is propagated by people who are so insecure that they must put others down to feel good about themselves.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

What is better then fisting? Fisting with a metal studded glove

thumb_up thumb_down +16

A man walks into a bar and orders 12 shots. "8?" Asks the bartender, to verify he had heard correctly. He feels unsure of giving the man 12 shots but does so anyways due to his financial situation and he hopes for a generous tip. Afterwards, the man kills 9 people in a car crash due to his level of intoxication and the bartender seeps into depression due to his feeling of guilt.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Guy 1: Why does it smell like a wet dog? Guy 2: Because I smell like a wet dog

thumb_up thumb_down +16

What did John say to Paul before they entered the car? "Paul, get in the car."

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops