What gets bigger and bigger and bigger, then dies? A baby.

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Why couldn't the man stop dancing? Because he had Parkinson's.

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What did the shark say to the beached whale? Nothing.

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- Knock Knock. - Who is it? - I am - I am what? - I am dying please help me. - Sorry, I don't speak with strangers.

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911 jokes are just plane wrong

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An astronaut, a nun and a fireman walk into a bar. They all order something to drink as they have all had a busy day.

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Tom: Hey Fred. Do you wanna hear a joke? Fred: Sure Tom! (long pause) (10 Minutes Later) Fred: Tom, I thought you were gonna tell me a joke? Tom: I did, the joke is that there is no joke.

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Why did the dead baby cross the road? It didn't it's a dead baby!

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what do a black guy and a white guy have in common? neither of them are purple

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Whats worse than one dead Baby in ten trash cans Getting raped by kobe

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Why did Billy kill Joey? Joey had sex with Billy's wife... and Billy wanted revenge.

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A paraplegic women falls off a boat. Regardless of the fact that she was wearing a properly inflated flotation device, she still managed to drown. She died instantly, the next day.

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Q: Why did Steve fall out of the tree A: He was raking the leaves

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What's brown and sticky? Molasses.

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How many mathematicians does it take to count?

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I love telling anti jokes rather than jokes because I was born with a rare case of ebola and suffer from alcoholicationism

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Whats worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Biting into a worm and finding an apple.

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Why are you on anti joke? Because your not funny enough to make your own jokes

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What happened to the boy after his life saving surgery? He died of an unrelated disease.

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Sarah Jessica Parker

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You wanna hear a joke? Me too

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Whats the difference between a Jew and a Pig? One makes bacon when smoked.

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How do you get a baby to stop crying? Run it over with a lawn mower!

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A Muslim, a Jew and a Christian are on an airplane talking about religion. The Jew tells the Christian he believes in a single holy entity. The Christian says he believe Christ is the Son of that very same entity. The Muslim says "When can I get out of this room?" because he's been detained at the airport due to religious profiling.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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