a older brother and a lil brother have bunk beds, one night the older brother has his gf sneak over, they are going to have sex. he tells his gf, "say lettace for a new positon and say tomato for stop", they start and she screams, "lettace, tomato, lettace, tomato". then the lil brother says " will you guys stop making salad, ur getting mayonase all over my face!!!!"

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roses are red violets are blue bullets are lead now i shoot you

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In your case, maybe because it is time to stop thinking so much, and begin living life, if the world cannot appreciate a wise man such as yourself, maybe that man should stop being wise, and begin being happy.

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In mediavel times :A Jew rapes his mom.... He is promptly taken out of society and thrown into a lions den due to his act of imortality.

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Why do teens say "dude?" They feel unloved at home and must know that they posses a strong relationship with their peers, and in fact, cannot maintain a proper friendship due to the four letter word known as "dude."

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How do you stop a black man from spitting? People of all races and colours are quite within their right to spit on their own property whenever they wish. However if anyone spits on or near you, you could report him to the police, but don't expect to be taken seriously.

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Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive? Because she was blind.

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What did the Brontosaurus say to the Triceratops? Nothing. Neither of them have ever existed.

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What's worse then a worm in your apple? When your apples a human

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Q: How did the man walk across the road? A: With his own 2 feet!

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Knock knock Who's there? The police, your son just died of terroristic bombing.

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Why didn't Jane text James? Because she was kidnapped.

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A muslim guy walks into a bar and orders a water as he isnt allowed to drink alcohol

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How do you get Sally of the swing? Throw a clown at her.

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why was the clown sad? died of cancer and left his loving family to fend for themselves in this cruel, cruel world.

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dont be afraid of lard squeezing cause really its just me teasing

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How can you tell a blonde a brunette and a red head apart? Ask them if that is their natural hair color.

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Why can't the black guy read? Because he's blind.

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Can you spell iCup? I see you pee?

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Women are like fish. It's hard to tell when they are crying underwater.

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How do you know to start calling a fetus a baby? If it cries when you abort it.

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What do a bike and a duck have in common? They both have handlebars except for the duck.

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What do u call a joke with no punchline? An anti-joke

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Have you ever seen that gay clown in asda.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops