What is the biggest lie in everyone's childhood? "School lunch food is actually good."

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dassa

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What happens when a black man spills all of his grape soda? He cleans it up and recycles the empty can

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Life is like swimming. When you drown you die.

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What do you call a man with no arms or legs? Names.

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hi penis ham telephone

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What's worse than getting raped by a duck? Getting raped by two ducks.

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dalas rof rezilitref taerg a si citsalp. Read it from right to left.

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Q: what r u eating under there? A: underwear ewww thats nasty

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roses are grey violets are grey im a dog

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What's worse than swing a dead baby by a rope? Stopping it with a shovel.

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What's worse than failing your midterms? Child abuse.

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What happens when you run over a mexican? The country gets one less illegal immigrant.

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Dyslexia ruels!

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Why did Susie fall off the swings? She had no arms. Knock! Knock! Who's there? Not Susie.

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Why didnt the boy finish the race? Becuase he stepped on a land mine.

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hey guys im gay

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first monkey. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure.

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Why cant the asian find his family? His eyes were too squinty

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why did the little boy die? He had AIDS

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Three children had stumbled upon a magic slide. There was a sign on the slide stating that what ever they shouted, they would land in a pool of it at the bottom of the slide. So the first child began sliding and shouted out "JELLY" and sure enough he landed in a large pool of jelly when he reached the bottom of the slide. The next child, so excited to go down the slide began sliding down. She shouted out "LOLLIES" and sure enough she landed in a large pool of sweets and chocolates at the bottom of the slide. Finally, the youngest girl in the group mounted the slide. As she was going down she was enjoying the slide so much that she shouted "POOS POOS" forgetting the rule of the magic slide and finally landing in a large pool of excrement.

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What do you call a gorilla with a banana in each ear? A gorilla with with a banana in each ear? Unless it has a name, then refer to it by it's name. be polite.

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what do you call your mom? mom

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Why were there bones on the moon? The cow diden't make it.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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