hola said the chinese man

The saying "When Pigs Fly" Can easily be canceled. Just tie a rocket and wings to it and let it go.

Why did the chair fall off the cliff? Well it is an inamitate object so it did not move itself, someone must have threw it

whats bad about being black and jewish they have to sit in the back of the oven

What succeeds most of the time? The population of a field with grass.

A horse walks into a bar, and orders a drink. The bartender is amazed at first, but then remembers that he just did acid.

What do you get a kid with no arms for Christmas? Hungry, Hungry Hippos.

Two scientists walk into a bar. The first scientist says, "I'll have some H2O." The second scientist says, "I'll have H2O too." The bartender gives them both water, realizing that H2O2 is poisonous and that the second scientist must have simple worded his request poorly.

Why did the lamborghini drive off the cliff? Because the person driving was a fridge

What ever happened to Sally? We don't know she went missing over 5 years ago.

Q: A man, already drunk, walked into a bar. What did he say? A: Ouch!

Yo momma so fat she's obese.

What did one apple say to the other apple? -Nothing, apples can't talk

Why did the blond paint in the nude? because she couldn't find her clothes, and wanted to express her emotions through art

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

whos on the right track? lady gaga

How often do you remember a dream? Well what if I told you that this is a dream go ahead pinch your arm. You probably didn't feel pain. And just incase jump out a fifth story window. Come on do it. Now if you are still reading this you are either dreaming or didn't jump out the window. Shame on you!!!!!!

If the covalent bonds of two Hydrogen atoms and one Oxygen atom creates water, which subs are currently on the 5-dollar-foot-long menu at Subway?

What's worse than a car going backwards on the highway? A steamroller going backwards on the highway.

What do you call a full refrigerator? A freezer

Why could'nt the Jew drink milk? He was laptose intolerant.

What do you call a man with no arms and no legs? That depends on what his name is.

Knock Knock Who's there? Max. Max who? Max who starts his greeting with,  "In accordance with Megan's law"  

Knock knock? Who's there? John. John who? John who is hospitalized in critical condition because he was struck by a ladder.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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