So an alien walks into a bar......... and everyone runs away secreaming because theres an alien in the bar.

How many babies does it take to paint a wall red? It depends on their painting skills.

When one person has an imaginary friend, you call it being crazy. But when more than one person has the same imaginary friend, you call it religion.

What are the differences between a black man and a park bench? One's a chair and ones a person.

What kind of shots does John take at night? Insulin, because he's a diabetic.

There once was a man named bulagala moo moo boom chicka boom. Sometimes, when wipe the toilet tissue breaks and my fingers get all dirty. Good thing I have insurance!

What's worse than Bogans? Boat people.

Q: How did the dead baby get to the other side of the road? A: I threw it over there.

Knock knock Who's there? The Land Lord The Land Lord who? I am here to evict you.

Who pushed joe off the building? Nobody. joe hated his life and wanted to die

Why did the chicken Cross the road? Because a Blackman was chasing his dinner

Your dad isn't gay...but his boyfriend..HES REALLY GAY!

How many babies can you fit in an oven? Depends how hungry you are.

Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? He died! Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? He was attached to the first! Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? He thought it was a game! Why did the fridge fall out of the tree? The branch broke! Why did Sally fall off her bike? She got hit by three monkeys and a fridge!

How many blondes does it take to change a lightbulb? One.

A man is in a bar with a drink A lorry driver come in a gulp the guys drink down The man starts crying the lorry driver says"don't cry I will buy you another" The guy says "it's not that: Today I woke up late for work and when I finally got there my boss fired me so I get in my car to go home and it wont start so I walk home while it's raining and when I got in I found that my wife was sleeping with the gardener so I came down here and asked for some poison and you went and drank it"

a man offers an innocent little child some candy from his van upon arrival the child is raped and beaten suverily. -teagan doherty-

Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven is a serial rapist and has been harrassing six for months.

What can you use a broken watch for? A compass.

Your momma so poor, she has a hard time paying her bills.

what do you call a shitty anti-joke? A shitty anti-joke.

A person tells an anti-joke. Nothing out of the ordinary happens.

How many dead kids can you fit into a plastic bag in your trunk? Ask Kasey Anthony

Why did the chicken croos the road? It didnt, my father caught him and cooked him for dinner.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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