Why couldn't the woman drive? She was dead.

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting raped by a giant scorpian. Whats worse than getting raped by a giant scorpian? Getting tortured to death. Whats worse than being tortured to death? Getting raped by a giant scorpian, and getting tortured to death. Whats worse than that? Getting raped by a giant scorpian, getting tortured to death, and finding a worm in your apple.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have herpes now you do too.

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Why don't traffic lights go swimming? Because they aren't sentient or animate, and therefore can't decide to undertake such an activity. Even if they were sentient, they wouldn't enjoy swimming as the water would damage their electrical works.

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Why was the blonde fired from the factory? Repeated absences and violation of company policy.

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Eh yo Sean u mr. Kingston Hey, how are you doing?

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A Priest, a Rabbi, and an Orca Whale walk into a local eatery to discuss what is on their mind. The Priest says he is proud that even though their community is comprised of people residing in many different religions, they still work together to strive for a better tomorrow. The Rabbi nods his head in agreement,he states that he is proud of all the hard working men in their community that are willing to make sacrifices for the needy. The Orca Whale also nods in agreement and pauses for a moment to think while he insight-fully gleams at his two other friends. The Mighty Orca Whale then contributes to the conversation by saying eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuurrrr!

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just imagine like a whole dad no imagine like 1000 dads an army of dads ready to conquer

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roses are red violets are blue i suck at poems i like your boobs

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Why did the road cross the chicken? Well, according to Einstein's Theory of Special Relativity, if you and the chicken were to cross the road simultaneously, your perspective, relative to the chicken, would remain unchanged. Therefore, the road would appear to move underneath the chicken, which would seem to be performing some style of polka dance.

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How did the young boy cross the road? He was stapled to the chicken.

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Why is Chuck Norris so frickin awesome? He just is cause he's chuck norris

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock, knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

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Two children are opening presents for Christmas. Daughter: "Look how many beautiful things I've got, look how much parents love me! And you got a Jo-Jo! Ha-ha!" Son*playing with Jo-Jo*: "Yeah, some of us have Jo-Jo, and some of us leuchemia. Ha-ha."

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Knock, Knock whos there? Jesus Jesus who? Jesus Christ

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Why is Stevie Wonder always smiling? Because he is quite wealthy.

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You know who else sucks dick? My aunt Jane. She was forced to become a prostitute after she got fired from her job.

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A: Why are black people so good at sports? B: Practice and determination.

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What is a holocaust survivors favorite food nothing

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To go hang himself.

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding an apple in your worm.

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What's the difference between you and a polar bear? I don't hate the polar bear

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Robin, get in the car, please.

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Man: Did it hurt? Woman: huh? Man: Did it hurt when i killed your family?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops