Ants are the Velociraptors of the insect world.

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Your mother's so ugly she has low self-esteem

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Why did the man have an extremely large nose? It just so happens that both his father and mother had large noses as well and nature took it's course.

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Why Bono always walk barefoot ? Because he's an asshole.

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Guest what? Dog

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so a guy walks into a bar, he says nothing for he now has a concusion

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Playing hide and seek with Dennis Ferguson

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Why did the old lady talk to a tree? She had Alzheimer's and was going to die.

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What's the difference between a chicken? One leg is both the same

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What sinks quickly to the bottom of a river? Your dead parents.

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anti-joke.ru - russian style

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Chris: Hey, want to hear a sad joke? Joe: No, those are mean and offensive.

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What's green fury has 4 legs, and if it fell out of a tree it would kill you. A pool-table

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"Knock Knock" "Who's there?" "Interrupting Doctor" "Interrupting Doc-" "You have Cancer'

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What's so great about twenty-three year olds? There's twenty of them.

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Q: Why are black people so tall? A: Not all black people are tall, and if they are it is probably from their specific genes.

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"Knock knock!" "Who's there?" "A door to door salesman. Are you unsatisfied with the way your dish soap handles your plates? Then I have the product for you!" "I'm not interested in your product, but thank you anyway." "No problem. On an off note, how did you hear me? I didn't speak very loudly when I said knock knock, and I didn't even bother to knock on the door or ring the doorbell." "I have really good hearing." "Oh, okay. And for future reference, maybe you should open the door when talking to a visitor. Then body language gets established and the conversation flows more nicely that way." "That's some good advice, and I'll take it. Thanks, salesman." "You're welcome. On to the next house."

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What do you call a horse that likes to box? A horse

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What do you call the offspring of a gerbil and a hamster? Whatever you want.

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What do you do if a blonde throws a grenade at you? You die.

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what did the lion tell the jellyfish? nothing, both lions and jellyfishes cant talk, and even if they could the chances of a lion meeting a jellyfish are remote

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Why was the man so cold? He was in a fridge

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Why did the little girl keep running into things Because she was blind

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What do you call a person who is black? A black person.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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