What's worse than knowing you have Hepititis C? Not knowing.

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why was the little boy brutally murdered? there was a serial killer in his town.

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In the middle of english class, Little Timmy raised his hand and asked "Can I use the restroom" The english teacher said " I don't know, CAN you?" Little Timmy said "When I was using "can" I was using its secondary model form as a verbal modifier asking for permission, as opposed to expressing an ability. I thought since you were a teacher you'd know that. My bad. MAY I use the restroom?

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A cow walks down the stairs. Not really. They are incapable of walking down stairs. It actually died on the roof.

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A handless Asian boy was riding his bike through the park with some friends. One of his friends puts his arms in the air and yells "Look! No hands!" The handless boy rides his bike home, crying and thinking about how one day he would like to say, "Look! No hands!" without people getting nauseous.

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Whats the difference between pizza and a Jewish person? Pizza doesnt scream when being put into an oven.

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Knock knock Who's there? Orange That's impossible...

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why couldn't the little boy sleep? he was being tortured.

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Knock knock. Who's there? The Postman Will you sign hear please he said Oh my toaster came

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What is 100(1+1) -100 + 50 x2 - 300? 0. But who cares? The answer is as worthless as you.

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What did the woman say to the dog? Stop shitting on my carpet your dickhole

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why does paul mccartney not wear shoes? cause a nigga stole it

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roy g biv

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Why did the man crossing the busy road die? because he wanted to

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Did you hear Whitney Houston died? Yes.

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While running away a burgular cut his hand on a piece of glass. He fell to the ground bleeding like crazy. What did the police say when he saw the burgular? You've been caught red handed.

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whats 7+4? 74

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What is black and hangs from a white supremacists tree? His kids tire swing.

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What trees do fortune tellers look at? Whichever variety of species are indigenous to where they live.

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How does an electrician install an outlet? I don't know. I'm not an electrician.t

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You are so ugly that for Halloween you had to trick or treat by phone.

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why was the clown sad? because his wife left him

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Why did the young boy die from Aggressive cancer? ...Because there isn't a cure.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops