If the goverment wants us to be eco friendly then why are the eco friendly cars so expensive?

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hi mom

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Why did the fat man fall off the swing? Because he weighed 855 pounds and it broke.

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One day Jesus said to John, " come forth and recieve everlasting life." Sadly John came in fifth and won a toaster.

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Where did the kid go when the bomb exploded? Everywhere

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Person 1: Why does food from Subway taste so good? Person 2: I don't know, why? Person 1: Because their ingredients are fresh. Person 2: Um, OK? Person 1: Yeah, it's all under 18. Person 2: Shit...

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why did the chicken cross the road? it didnt it got hit by a bus.

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Question: So, what do you get if you put a live dog, a dead cat, some sugarcubes, and your sisters panties (HORMONES OKAY? EVERYBODY KNOWS HORMONES EQUALS SPICE! Or something anyways...) In a blender until its all red and squishy? The hell I know, but put some Redbull in it, and its fucking delicious!

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Roses are blue Colton is gay

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A woman gets on a bus with her baby. The bus driver says: "That's the ugliest baby that I've ever seen." The woman goes to the rear of the bus and sits down, fuming. She says to a man next to her, "That driver just insulted me!" The man says, "You go right up there and tell him off! Go ahead, I'll hold your monkey for you."

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You cant spell chorus with out... Vagina!

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What the flower say to the bird. Nothing

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What's green and frolics in the forest? A flock of cucumbers.

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What do a fish and an eagle have in common? They both live underwater aside from the eagle.

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There's 2 black guys in a car. Who's driving. Probably one of the 2 men.

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A black guy and a white guy are in a car. What is going to happen? They will arrive at their destination.

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when Life gives you lemons, make lemonade. So i made some lemonade. Turns out the lemons Kawazaki Life gave me were poisoned and i shortly die afterwards. i wouldve died cursing out her name but she was cute so i forgave her in my mind. and thus i die in peace.

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? She was deaf and blind.

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What do you call it when Justin Beiber has sex with a girl? Consensual sexual intercourse between two young adults.

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how do u get to your favorite chinese restaurant? wok.

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Whats worse than being a jew? Having all of your friends viciously murdered at a party that you weren't invited to.

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whats yellow and cant swim? a bulldozer,

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What? Huh?

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Why did the little kid use pillows at night? Because he was constipated.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops