What did the man say to the other man? I have a large rod

Quantum Mechanics is so difficult to understand, somewhere Stephen Hawking just walked into a bar.

The next sentence is true. The last sentence was a lie.

Why was the orphan's christmas sad? He got a violent chest infection and died.

Why did the man trip over the kitten? He was blind.

Pull my finger ouch..

jacob mckeand broke his arm and now he cant wank :(:(:(

Knock Knock? Who's there? Doctor Doctor Who? It is a science fiction show about a time traveller

Why did the crossing guard drop his whistle? Because a kid got hit by a passing elephant.

Ask me if I'm Abraham Lincoln. Are you Abraham Lincoln? No.

what did the man say to the other man he bumped into? sorry. and they never saw eachother again

What's a boomerang that doesn't come back? A stick

How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? Blond answers: Whaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaat............?

Well no, thats not true, sorry, I mean I GET THAT ALL THE FUCKING TIME!

A man is boarding a plane. The attendant asks if he has a passport. The man says no, and leaves.

Why cant Sally ride her bike? Because she has ceribal pausly

Why was the plumber sad? Because his family died in a car crash

Why did the boy drown? Because he was actually a brick. I lied about him being a boy.

Adolf the Red-Nosed Hitler

A black person tans and starts to peel, what do you get? A white person.

A zen master walks up to a hot dog vendor and says, "Make me one with everything." The vendor says, "Sorry, we're out of relish." Then the zen master tells him, "Sir, I don't think you get the joke. As you can see by my long silk robes and fu manchu, I am clearly a zen master. And I have used a pun that would make you think I were asking for enlightenment from a hot dog." The vendor then says, "We don't take too kindly to wise guys here." And then the prick gets up and tosses me into the street!

How do you fit four gay men on a bar stool? You build an exceptionally large bar stool

Chuck Norris was so famous we was casted for the show Walker, Texas Ranger

What do a chicken and a grape have in comon? - They're both purple, except for the chicken.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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