whats worse than someone on the phone during a movie? your mother queefing on your bowl of cheerios

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A Jew, a black man and a Christian enter a bar. Black people werent allowed in at the time so he was escorted out. The Jew And Christian have a blast and the time of their lives that night.

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Q: What did the Catholic man say in response to the gay man asking what he likes to do? A: golf

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Your mother is so heavy that she decided to try out nutrisystem

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As far as I know, the day after tomorrow is going to be YOUR lucky day, because you will be tasting sausage for the first time with your lower lips... No seriously, you cant be virgin, you can tell me the truth, you like 24 or something?

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why did the slytherin cross the road twice? ... because they are double-crossers.

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Knock, Knock? Who's there? Its Gilly.

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A blindman walks into a bar... then a chair, then a pole

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got into the Batmobile? Robin get in the Batmobile.

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What do you call a Jew A Jew

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'm random but can still rhyme Hatsune Miku

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: In order to avoid being mauled by a coyote.

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Why wasn't the little boy allowed to get a dog? Because the orphanage he lives at doesn't allow dogs.

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How do you annoy a farmer? Shoot his wife.

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What did the Pedophile say to the small girl? I have served my sentence and been successfully rehabilitated. Please continue playing out in public without fear of being sexually assaulted.

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I went to school. Then I came home.

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Why wouldn't anyone want Helen Kellers dog? It's been buried for a long time...

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they told me not to write here but i did

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What did Han Solo say to Chewy before they got in the Millennium Falcon? Chewy, get in the ship.

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A man walks into a bar and probably sustains serious head injuries and possibly a concussion as most bars are usually made out of solid metals such as iron or steel and is therefore not permitted by his doctor to engage in sports or other rigorous activities for an allotted period of time depending on the degree of his injury.

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Two Muslim men board an American Airlines jet. Nobody feels threatened and engage in friendly conversations with the passengers. The aircraft explodes due to poorly manufactured engine parts made by small starving children.

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A zebra walks into bar, the surrounding customers in the bar become very intrigued why this exotic creature has wandered from Africa into New york. Before they can come to a concluson animal control opens fire on the creature, splatering its organs onto the tables. This event ruined the night for most customers and they fileout of the bar calmly but sad

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So, this cheerio is in love with a beautiful frosted cheerio. He asks her on a date. She says no, because she only dates other frosted cheerios. So the cheerio works really hard at his job and is promoted to a honey-nut cheerio. So he asks her out again. She says no because she only dates frosted cheerios. So he works even harder and is made a frosted cheerio. He asks her out again and she accepts. 4 months later after a relationship built on trust and understanding they are married and live a long and fullfilling life together.

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Why did the Jewish man leaves a coffee shop without leaving a tip? He was homeless and spent his last cents on the coffee.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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