Why did the monkey fall out of the tree It was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree It was stapled to the first monkey Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree Peer pressure.

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Why was six afraid of seven? Seven was a serial killer.

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7,7,7,7,7,7,7,7,7,7,7,7,7,8

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Why couldn't the bunny hop? Because it lost both it's legs

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A Black guy and a Jewish guy walk into a bar. What does the black guy say to the Jew? "Hi".

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What is yellow and bright? The sun.

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PROS = good things CONS = bad thing So, if PROgress is a good thing...then why is the US government call CONgress?

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If a banana is a vegetable, how come your mother gets confused when I stick pretzels in my butthole?

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How many black men does it take to change a light bulb? TO GET TO THE OTHER SIDE!

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Person 1: Why do Jews have big noses? Person 2: Why? Person 1: No, I was asking you that question. Person 2: ??!!

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Q: What do people usually find funny? A: A joke.

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how do you tell a politician that you hate him? politicians can be female, too.

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How do you make a 4 year old cry? You tell him all his family died in a horrible plane crash.

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She loves me, she dosn't love me, she loves me, the girl walks up to the man and says, she doesn't love me

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karn chevalier

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You scream I scream We all screamed when the chicken crossed the road

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How many black people does it take to solve a complex physics equation? Trick question

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Who is the best person to do your nails with? Nobody, you have no friends.

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Knock knock. Whose there? Orange. Orange who? NOTHING, because NOTHING rhymes with orange!

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A 21 year old man walks into a bar. After looking at the menu for a minute he orders the cocktail of the day. The bartender looks at the man in disbelief because he has such a baby face and looks like a teenage kid. The bartender politely asks to see his ID. The man pulls out his wallet and shows him his drivers license. Sure enough he was the legal age of drinking. The bartender says "Thank you" and gives him his beverage.

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Why is sally sad her parents abuse her daily

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A panda walks into a restaurant, sits down and orders a sandwich. After he finishes eating the sandwich, the panda pulls out a gun and shoots the waiter, and then stands up to go. "Hey!" shouts the manager. "Where are you going? You just shot my waiter and you didn't pay for your sandwich!" The panda yells back at the manager, "Hey man, I am a PANDA! Look it up!" The manager's heart skipped a beat, and he locked himself inside his office, trembling with fear and confusion. Yes, it was plausible that a beast such as that could point to a random entry on the menu, and it was physically possible for it to pull the trigger of the gun (and, at such close proximity to the waiter, it would be pretty hard to miss him), but it was shocking and altogether disturbing to hear such an animal speak in human language, much less vernacular English.

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minorities.....

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There once was a plain Cheerio. He has a decent life with a low paying job and an apartment. One day, he decided to make his life more fun and started going to parties. He met some women and had a good time. He was happier and was soon promoted at work. The next day, he woke up and tasted himself, only to discover that he was now a Honey-nut Cheerio. He continued to go to parties and met a girl that eventually became his girlfriend. He became a manager at work and moved into an expensive condo. The next day, he woke up and tasted himself and was a Frosted Cheerio. He then quit his job and opened a club, where he became the most popular Cheerio in town. All guys wanted to be him, girls with him. At one party, his girlfriend asked him for some punch. He went to the kitchen but couldn't find any. There was no punch-line.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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