roses are blue violets are green I am colorblind

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Q: What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in the water? A: Shark bait.

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Your mom is so stupid she has trouble holding a steady job and struggles to support her family.

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women and girls can really get enjoyment out of sex. it's not really about controlling the man.

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What do you call a fish without an eye? Impaired of vision.

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What do you get when you cross a peanut and a snake? peanutsnake

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Why is my penis so small? No, seriously, can anyone tell me?

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What did the douche bag get for Christmas? Your girlfriend.

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What's better than winning the special Olympics? Getting laid at the special Olympics.

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Why was the Asian terrible at driving? He was drunk.

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Two muffins are sitting in an oven. Except when I said muffins I meant Jews. .. I guess it really isn't that funny anymore.

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Fun fact: Steel wool comes from the fleeces of iron sheep.

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Why did Bob fall over? He was impaled by a narwhal. -BG

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Hey, I just met you, And this is crazy, But here's my number, So call me anytime you're free, but I can't guarantee I will answer because I could be at work.

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What did the mexican firefighter name his kids? Jose and Pablo

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I will see it when I believe it, as far as your order or whatever goes, I have already taken a look, and its nothing for me, you hide behind idealism yet use cruel methods and inhuman tactics in order to justify your means, you hide behind a shell of fucking "charm" and employ people to harass others. YOU ARE NO FUCKING BETTER THAN THE REST! YOU ARE BENEATH ME! As for that sister fucking bullshit, joke is on you, I do not have a sister! I bet that was one of your fucking "Nero`s" all six billion of your fucking personality disorders. Moral: I am the FUCKING MORAL MAN! And while I do not have a sister to rape, ill get down with yours.

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Q: What do dogs and wind have in common? A: They're both blue. Except the dog. Or the wind. Wind is colorless.

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What's red and looks like a bucket? A red bucket. What's blue and looks like a bucket? A red bucket in disguise.

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knock knock Dave's not here.

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Where did the Smith family spend their weekend together? At the father's funeral.

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So yesterday i walked into a bar, so what?

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How did th-A fridge.

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fava beans

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what do you call a joke that makes no sense? a joke that makes no sense

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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