Oh please! Come on! Those that got to us where mostly Russians remember? And what where my parents? (if you do not know you might have guessed it by now) I found a guy that looked about the same as me, messed him up and put my jacket on him, I do not die that easily. Anyway, id explain more, but I have been without these fucking painkillers so long that I am talking trash on this stupid site again... Seriously the pain I am used to, but this addiction on painkillers is a bitch... (shedog if censor got a hold on it) But it turns out I cant sleep without them, sleep just does not come anymore, so Ill go get some now. Who are you by the way? I am Nero7, Aka Axel Knight.

Why is it bad luck for a black cat to cross your path? I'll tell you in Heaven

Roses are Red Violets are blue I have short term memory loss Hey look thats my bike over there.

What did the farmer say when he finally found his tractor? "Wheres my tractor?" Oh ya he had alzheimers.

Q: Why did the man have aids? A: He had unprotected sex with a man who had aids.

Q: What do you call a colour blind person that smells like green paint? A: A painter

How do you kill a blonde? Tell her she can breath underwater.

A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear. The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear. The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf." (props- Marty Smith)

What did the wall say to the other wall? Nothing. Walls don't talk.

Why was six afraid of seven. It wasnt because numbers cant possible show emotions. I

why was six afraid of seven? because seven eight nine

Roses are gray, violets are gray. I'm color blind.

What did the fat kid get for Christmas? Diabetes......

do you listen to dubstep? OH YEA I LOVE SKRILLEX -_-

What did the Hungarian say before he went to bed? "I'm going to bed," but he said it in Hungarian.

roses are red, violets are blue. sunflowers are yellow, i bet you were expecting something romantic but no this is just gardening facts.

A man walks to a bar and sees a very hot blonde sitting across the room. Turns out it was actually a blonde man and they both had a wonderful night because they were both homosexual.

When life gives you melons, your dyslexic

Q. How can you tell if a snake bites? A. It depends on if he walks to school or carries his lunch.

1: Knock Knock? 2: Who's There? *runs*

What is holocaust victim's favorite food? Hamburgers.

Kevin stinks signed Taggart. Is this how you do it!!!

In particle-joke physics, the antijoke is the extension of the concept of the antiparticle to the joke, where the antijoke is composed of antiparticles in the same way that the normal joke is composed of particles. Furthermore, mixing jokes and antijokes can lead to the annihilation of both, in the same way that mixing antiparticles and particles does.The result of antijoke meeting jokes is an explosion.[1]

Two Guys Walk into a bar, you would think one of them would've seen it

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...