A bartender walks into a bar. About 8 hours later, he goes home.

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What did the man say when he walked into a bar? Nothing because he got knocked out because he was running too fast and hit his head.

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A girl walks into a supermarket. She picks up a banana, a can of soup, and a loaf of bread. She then walks up to the cash register to pay. The cashier looks at her and the items she has and says, "I can tell you're single." She smiles and responds, "How do you know that?" He says, "Because you're ugly."

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What was the little boys least favorite part of Christmas? Getting raped by his uncle.

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What did the Asian say to his racist friend? You're racist

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Dislike this joke for a cookie However if you like this joke you dont get a cookie

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Why didn't the skeleton cross the road? Because he has no sense of living and no muscles to move.

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A baby seal walks into a club. I happens to be that the club is having their bi-annual PETA meeting, and the baby seal is chosen as the organization's new mascot. After touring the nation and meeting important world leaders, the baby seal still wonders why there was a club at the North Pole.

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Q: why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: because it was dead.

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hey! Wanna hear a bird joke? No. Well this is Hawkward....

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What did one duck say to the other? "Quack" Ducks don't talk. But if it were to say something it would probably mention how it is concerned about the fact that the majority of people on the internet don't know what ducks say to each other.

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A blonde, redhead, and a brunette are chatting outside a casino. The brunette directs a joke towards the blonde. "What's the difference between cotton candy and pork chops?" The blonde has heard the joke prior to this encounter and correctly completes it with sign language because she is deaf.

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What dd the man say to his wife? Make me a samich!

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How did the Nazis torture someone? They inserted a glass tube in the penis and flicked the end so that it shattered.

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What color is cotton? White Well in Afrca, they grow black cotton

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What's worse than being a midget Being a midget with no legs

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Why did seven eat nine? Because six was afraid of him.

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What does the thirsty butcher drink? Chocolate milk. Because he can.

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why did the man buy kool aid? because it was on sale and he was thirsty

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have herpes And now so do you

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How do you make a baby cry ? Throw a brick at his face

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A man walks into a bar he said oww when did this metel bar get here

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why was 6 afraid of 9? cause thats just gross.

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roses are red violets are blue they are pretty and you are not

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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