A man walked into a bar. Ouch! He tripped over the little step at the entrance. But don't worry, he's not hurt, it just startled him for a second there. They should put a caution sign out front, somebody might get a serious injury. You can never be too safe, after all.

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There are 3 guys named:Poop, Shut up and Manners. They all were speeding down the street, they took a sharp turn and Poop fell out of the back. A cop pulled them over while Manners got out to go get Poop. The cop says, "whats your name." "Shut up." "No seriously whats your name." "Shut up" he says a little bit harsher. "Wheres your manners?" the cop says. "Back there picking up Poop."

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What do you call white trash Garbage

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Q:how do you make a rockstar cry? A: hit him with a breifcase

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Why did the boy fall off the swings? He had no arms.

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What's worse than tornadoes in the USA? Earthquakes in Japan.

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If a tree falls on a woman and there is no one around to hear it, she was probably lonely.

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How much does the Holo cost? Six million.

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What can kill you when it falls out of a tree? Anything of a considerable weight actually.

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How do you wake a sleeping bear? Kick it.

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Why does the kid cries when he sees me? Cuz i took his lollypop last week.

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--- ___________________--- Can you tell what it is? Yes... Then what is it? Its a blanket,duh! ......

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It's really irrelevant when you realize this joke is about a suicidal chicken...

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he took my chicken i shoot him in the foot and raped his dog

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A man told his daughter not to give his dog coffee. His daughter turned and told him that she was his nurse and his alzheimers is getting worse.

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Horse.

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Q. Whats blue and looks like a bucket? A. a blue bucket Q. whats green and looks like a bucket? A. a blue bucket in disguise.

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Q: What did the shark say while eating the surfer A: Nothing, his mouth was full, and besides....sharks cannot talk.

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did you hear about the little girl who won first place in her school's spelling bee? she was hit by a bus

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-Knock knock -Use the doorbell -Oh... ding dong -Who is it? -Me -Oh -Yeah -Cool -Come in -Okay -Take off your shoes -Alright -How are you? -Good -That's good -Yeah -Okay -K -Oh -Bye -See ya

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What is green, and could kill you if it falls out of a tree? A pool table.

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oh, brown loaf is fine, i'm on my bike.

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hey! Wanna hear a bird joke? No. Well this is Hawkward....

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your in court a woman police officer says anything you say can and will be held against you. the man replies titty

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops