why did the man get arrested? because he was a thief, and thieving is completely unacceptable in a civilised society

thumb_up thumb_down -3

How do you get a girl to pay for food? You Rape Her

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What do Muslims and Jews have in common? Shared humanity.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Two nuns are in a bathtub, one nun turns to the other and says "where's the soap". The other nun replies "it does, doesn't it".

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Playing Jenga on September 11th.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Q: Why did the white man die? A: because he had cancer

thumb_up thumb_down -3

A man walks into a bar. Realizing he forgot his ID, he leaves.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

In Soviet Russia it's pretty cold.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What do you get when you cross a gay eskimo and a black man? Nothing, as two male humans cannot reproduce.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

4 hours later.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

what do ninjas and gay people have in common... if you eat them they will no longer be alive

thumb_up thumb_down -3

27

thumb_up thumb_down -3

An elephant walks in a bar. The bartender and everyone rushed out as soon as they saw the elephant

thumb_up thumb_down -3

How do you get rid of herpes? You shoot up the cancer ward of a hospital.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What's a black man's favorite fruit? Clementines.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

So a baby seal walks into a club

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What's big, yellow and if it fell from a tree it would kill you? A JCB!

thumb_up thumb_down -3

"Roll back into the kitchen and imagine me a sandwich!" yelled the abusive husband to his paraplegic wife.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

pee

thumb_up thumb_down -3

A black kid, a white kid, an Asian, and a Dane all take acid in a room. They have a profound experience and find a greater meaning in life.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Why did the man get a DUI? Because he was driving under the influence.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Why couldn't the man sleep? Because he was a wax model in a museum, and as we all know wax models are inanimate objects thus incapable of consciousness and therefore incapable of unconsciousness as well. Many other inanimate objects are caught up in similar problems relating to their incapability to do anything.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Where did the drunk Mother drive? Back to the Bar because she forgot her Baby.. Except she left it left it on the roof of the car...

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What's better than a gold brick? 2 gold bricks.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops