What did the guy say when he lost his tractor? Wheres my tractor?

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Q: What do you call an underground train full of professors? A: It's very unlikely that the passengers on an underground train would consist entirely of professors, unless it was a special service booked solely for the attendees of highly specialised lectures which required each audience member to have completed a professorship.

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Q. Why did the chicken cross the road? A. To get to the other side.

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My mind is like full of holes so I cannot remember where I am anymore, and I am tired in addition, but say, what the hell is a tussle? Sounds cute, but what is that?

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Roses Are Red, Violets Are Blue, He gave me AIDS, And I gave them to you!

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Why was the mime crying? Her husband died.

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What is worse than being lost in the supermarket? Being lost in space.

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how do you get a blonde to stop following you? file a restraining order.

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Thats what she said

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A man walks into a bar, politely orders one drink, sips it while having social conversations with his peers, pays his tab, and goes to take the bus home. I can respect that.

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a boy scout wipes his butt with a dollar cause he had no toilet paper then the other boy scout hears him screaming they meet up later and the other boy scout askes why he was scream and the first boy scout says that is hard to wip your butt with 4 quarters.

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Why did princess diana cross the road? She wasn't wearing her seatbelt

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What'd the black woman say when she met her husband's white mistress? Hello, nice to meet you.

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KNOCK KNOCK who's there? OUCH! what's your door knob made of? nails?

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What do you say to a girl with two black eyes? Nothing you've already told her twice.

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Did you hear about the guy in town living in a tyre, he got a puncture now hes living in a flat.

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Q: What is tall, white, and shaped like a house? A: a tall white man, if you break his limbs and twist them into the rectangular shape of a house.

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A black man walks into a KFC, he then realizes that he is in the wrong store, and walks out.

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Why was the Black person afraid of the chainsaw? Be cause it goes run nigga nigga run nigga nigga run

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Q. What did the black lawyer say to the rabbi? A. We're both highly educated professionals.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Hurricane Irene.

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What is better than winning a gold medal at the special olympics? Not being retarded

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Q: How many babies does it take to paint a house? A: That depends how hard you throw them... Q: Whats worse than 10 babies nailed to 1 tree? A: 1 baby nailed to 10 trees...

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Your mother is so fat, that if she had 8 clones of her, they would probably not be able to stand in the elevator together due to the maximum capacity, and safety hazard.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops